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9 Lies to Unlearn Before its Too Late

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It’s not your work to make anything happen. It’s your work to dream it and let it happen. Law of Attraction will make it happen. In your joy, you create something, and then you maintain your vibrational harmony with it, and the Universe must find a way to bring it about. That’s the promise of Law of Attraction.” Abraham-Hicks

 

WRITTEN by MARC CHERNOFF

9 Lies to Unlearn Before it’s Too Late

The worst lies are the ones you tell yourself over and over again – the ones you live by.  Perhaps someone close to you ingrained these lies in your mind, perhaps you were influenced by the negativity of popular media channels, or perhaps they grew from simple, innocent misunderstandings.

Either way, next time you decide to learn something new for the sake of self-improvement, start by unlearning a lie that has been deceiving you.  Here are nine lies I have unlearned in my own life:

1.  Happiness is about getting what you want.

There are two ways people try to find happiness.  One is to continue to accumulate more and more of what they think they want.  The other is to appreciate what they already have.  The latter is the right path.  Happiness isn’t about getting what you want; it’s about wanting what you’ve got.  Happiness is not a goal, it’s a by-product of living well in each moment.

To be happy doesn’t mean you don’t desire more, it simply means you’re thankful for what you have and patient for what’s yet to come.  Sometimes it’s easy to get so caught up in trying to accomplish something big, that you fail to notice the little things that give life its magic.  So appreciate today for all it’s worth.  Today is one of the good old days you’re going to miss in the years ahead.

2.  Success looks a certain way.

You are not in this world to live up to everyone else’s expectations, nor should you feel that everyone else is here to live up to yours.  You’ve got to pave your own distinct path.  What success means to each of us is different.  It’s about spending your life happily in your own way.

You have your own personal calling that’s as unique as your fingerprints.  The best way to succeed is to discover this calling within you and then find a way to offer it to the world in the form of a beneficial service.  Ultimately, if you can wake up every morning and do something that makes a positive difference, makes you proud, and makes you smile, before you get back to bed, you are a true success.  (Angel and I discuss this process in the Success and Passion chapters of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)

3.  A busy day is a productive day.

“Work smarter, not harder” is one of the most common clichés in the personal development space.  But like most clichés, few people actually do it.  Go ahead and take a look around; the busy people outnumber the productive people by a wide margin.  Perhaps you’re one of them.

Busyness seems impressive.  It puts you in the heat of the action.  It gives you an elevated sense of accomplishment.  You’re always late for social engagements, barely have enough time for family get-togethers, and hardly get a moment to yourself.  Emails and texts are shooting out of your smartphone like machinegun bullets, commitments and meetings fill up your entire calendar, and sleep is an afterthought.  You’re like a rock star without a record.

Of course, it’s all just an illusion.  A commitment to anything more than the essential is to work harder, not smarter.  So flip it around and work smarter by putting first things first.

4.  To be brave is to not be afraid.

Truth be told, the only time you can be brave is when you are afraid.

Being brave is when you do something, regardless of your fears, because you know it’s the right thing to do.  In other words, you are afraid to do it because there are unknowns, but then you go ahead and do it anyway.

Whatever course you decide upon in life, there is always the possibility that something will go wrong.  There will always be difficulties arising that tempt you to fear that you don’t have what it takes.  To map out any course of action and follow it to an end requires bravery.  (Read Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway.)

5.  To be strong is to not feel pain.

Life is often painful.  It requires a worthy struggle for growth and experience.  Anyone who says differently is selling a lie.

The strongest people are the ones who feel pain, accept it, learn from it, and fight through it.  They turn their wounds into wisdom.  It’s all about having the courage to take a break, to shed a tear, to dust yourself off, and then to get back in the ring to fight like you’ve never fought before.

6.  Everyone around you is holding you back.

Many of us don’t genuinely want to be responsible for our own fate.  Perhaps we daydream about “fulfilling our dreams,” but we leave those dreams firmly in the realm of fantasy.  We don’t research them, talk to people about them, read related books, etc.  Somehow we prefer the fantasy to the reality.  And there’s nothing wrong with that, until we say that someone else is “holding us back”.  That turns an idle fantasy into a barricade of lies.

The truth is, if you’re not working on something meaningful today, the only person holding you back is YOU.  If you aren’t doing anything about your goals and dreams, you have no one to blame except yourself.  Either you take responsibility for your life or someone else will.  Blame is a scapegoat – it’s an easy way out of taking accountability for your own outcome.  It’s a lot easier to point the finger at someone or something else instead of looking within.

When it comes to working hard to achieve a goal or dream – earning a degree, building a business, or any other personal achievement that takes time and commitment – one thing you have to ask yourself is:  “Am I willing to live a few years of my life like many people won’t, so I can spend the rest of my life like many people can’t?”

7.  You are automatically entitled to certain things from others.

People are sometimes led to have a sense of entitlement because they falsely believe they are owed something based on the social role they have chosen.  For example, if someone has accepted the role of being someone’s friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife, they feel entitled to get certain favours from the other person.  If someone has accepted the role of being a parent, they feel entitled to being respected by their children.  If someone has accepted the role of being a consumer, they feel entitled to be served to their specific wishes.

Of course, these expectations of entitlement often go unfulfilled.  Why?  Because nothing in this world is promised.  Regardless of your chosen role in all your relationships and walks of life, you don’t automatically get any more than you openly communicate, negotiate, and work for.  (Read The Road Less Traveled.)

8.  You will feel comfortable when the time is right.

So many of us complain about the boring repetition present in our daily routines, yet we choose no clear course for correction.  We want to change something, but we never think the time is right.  Why?  Because the very source of our boredom also provides a solid foundation of comfort.  We are comfortable with our current surroundings.  Steering off the known track is risky, and we are subconsciously scared of what might happen if we do.

So, what happens when we stick to the current track?  Nothing.  We jog along the same circular track at a steady pace daily.  We pass by the same mile marker at the exact moment we did yesterday, and the day before, and the week before that.  There is not a worry on our minds because we already know the terrain that lies ahead.

If something makes you a bit nervous and uncomfortable, it means you’re doing it right and growing.  All great opportunities in life will force you to grow emotionally and intellectually.  They force you to stretch yourself and your comfort zone, which means you won’t feel totally comfortable at first.  And when you don’t feel comfortable, you will likely assume the timing isn’t right, even though it is.

9.  It’s already too late.

Nothing is too late until your tired heart stops beating.

If you’re reading this right now, congratulations, you are alive, which means it’s not too late for you.

Things can change if you want them to, at any age.  Right now you can choose differently and make something new happen.  Your future is immediate.  Grab on to it with both hands and keep on moving on.  When you come up on a roadblock and are faced with the choice of sitting down and doing nothing or doing something to make further progress, choose the latter.  Think, work, and climb if you have to.

Move your life forward.

The floor is yours…

What self-defeating lies do people often tell themselves?  What’s one self-defeating lie you once believed was true? 

 

Giving opens up the door to receiving. You have so many opportunities to give every day.

Give kind words. Give a smile. Give appreciation and love. Give compliments. You can give courtesy to other motorists while you are driving. You can give a smile to the car parking attendant. You can give a warm greeting to the newspaper stand person or the person who makes your coffee. You can give by allowing a stranger to go ahead of you into an elevator, and you can give by asking which floor they are going to and pressing the button for them. If someone drops something you can give a helping hand and pick it up for them. You can give warm embraces to those you love. And you can give appreciation and encouragement to everyone. There are so many opportunities for you to give and thereby open the door to receiving.  May the joy be with you, Rhonda Byrne

 

Your Vision of the future lies from within

Gray Lawrence

Utility Warehouse Distributor

“The Power of Listening is available to us all, only those who listen will gain great benefits in life, love personal & financial wealth. The decision is yours” – Gray Lawrence

ANTICIPATION

ANTICIPATION

From The Secret Daily Teachings

When you look at yourself and feel dissatisfaction about any part of you, you will continue to attract feelings of dissatisfaction, because the law mirrors back to you exactly what you are holding inside. Be in awe and wonder at the magnificence of you!   May the joy be with you,  Rhonda Byrne The Secret… bringing joy to billions

Anticipation vs. anxiety

If we define anxiety as experiencing failure in advance, we can also understand its antonym, anticipation.

When you work with anticipation, you will highlight the highs. You’ll double down on the things that will delight and push yourself even harder to be bold and to create your version of art. If this is going to work, might as well build something that’s going to be truly worth building.

If you work with anxiety, on the other hand, you’ll be covering the possible lost bets, you’ll be insuring against disaster and most of all, building deniability into everything you do. When you work under the cloud of anxiety, the best strategy is to play it safe, because if (when!) it fails, you’ll be blameless.

Not only is it more fun to work with anticipation, it’s often a self-fulfilling point of view.

“Although an individual may be born with a predisposition toward gloominess or anxiety, the emotional floor plan can be altered, the brain’s furniture moved to a more felicitous arrangement; with a little training, you can coax a fretful mind toward a happier outlook.” — Penelope Green

"The average human being thinks that happiness lies in stability, in tying up all the loose ends and having things under control. But actually, happiness lies in being able to relax with our true condition, which is basically fleeting, dynamic, and fluid, not in any way solid, not in any way permanent. It’s transient by nature."— Pema Chödrön

 

Know yourself! Watch how you manifest the small things in life and think about how you felt inside with those things. Think about how easily they came. You will find that you thought of a small thing once and never thought about it again, and then it manifested.

What really happened was you didn’t think any thoughts or speak any words which contradicted what you wanted, so the law of attraction was able to do its work.

May the joy be with you, – Rhonda Byrne The Secret

The Power is from within, the choice is yours

Gray Lawrence

Utility Warehouse Distributor

"Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start." Nido Qubein

Your Vision of the future, lies from within

 

Be Inspired By Mary O’Malley

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From The Secret Daily Teachings

It is so important that you are grateful for everything in your life. Many people focus on the one thing they want and then forget to be grateful for all the things they have. Without gratitude you cannot achieve anything through the law of attraction, because if you are not emanating gratitude from your being, then by default you are emanating ungratefulness. Be proactive and use the frequency of your being to receive what you want.   May the joy be with you,                          Rhonda Byrne   The Secret… bringing joy to billions

 

How To Let Your Brilliant Being Shine

 

I recently came across one of my favorite poems, My Brilliant Image, by the fourteenth century Persian Poet, Hafiz:

Mary O'MalleyOne day the sun admitted,
I am just a shadow.
I wish I could show you
The Infinite Incandescence
That has cast my brilliant image!
I wish I could show you,
When you are lonely or in darkness,
The astonishing Light
Of your own Being!

Hafiz is telling us that the astonishing light, the brilliance of our own being, is already with us.  We are filled with great light that permeates everything.    Brian Swimme, Evolutionary Philosopher and Co-Collaborator of the documentary film, Journey of the Universe, calls it “allurement”.  What we are talking about here is love.  Allurement and love mean the same thing.  It is allurement that brings the particles and atoms together.  It is allurement that brings atoms into communities called molecules.  And it is allurement that is bringing us into the awareness of our truth, the astonishing light of our own being.  This is exactly what Eben Alexander, author of Proof of Heaven, and Anita Moorjani, author of Dying to Be Me, experienced while lying in a hospital room in a coma.  They both discovered that “heaven” is a state, not a place.  This astonishing light or “state of heaven” is everything…it is the earth, the plants, the air, the wind, the trees, the animals, all of that, and it is also YOU!   Yet, most of us don’t realize it.  Like Sleeping Beauty, we pricked our finger on the spindle of the mental world and we have gone to sleep.

I use the meadow metaphor in my book, What’s In the Way IS the Way, to illustrate the beauty of our being.  It includes flow, spaciousness, light, love and stillness, and it has always been with us.  But, we haven’t noticed these qualities of the meadow in ourselves because we have so often been engulfed in struggle.  When we are in a dark place, facing any challenging situation in our lives, most of us are caught in our minds and we don’t see the beautiful meadow.  We only see the cloud bank around our heads.  But, as we begin to bring awareness to the struggling self, we begin to realize that the meadow has always been there.

Even if we only see these glimpses of the struggling self for a brief moment, this is a moment of consciousness.  I like to call this moment of consciousness “Look to Unhook”.   Rather than identifying with the feelings, one way to unhook from them is to say “I am sensing in me something that feels lonely” rather than “I feel lonely” or “I am sensing in me something that is terrified” rather than “I am terrified”.  When we are identified with the feelings that fear brings up inside of us, we feel cut off from life.  When we can say to ourselves “I See You”, we are relating to the loneliness or darkness, rather than from it.  By doing this, we begin to create a relationship with that young part of us that was conditioned into a world of fear.  Eventually we can learn to be with our feelings for longer periods of time, but it is a process.  The first step is recognizing what is going on inside of us and then realizing that our states of mind are just stories in our heads.   Then, we can begin to see the light and love that we are as we learn to bring spaciousness to these dark, lonely, fearful states of mind.  And, like Sleeping Beauty who was kissed by the Prince, we can begin to wake up.  The Prince called Life is waking us up.

Mary O’Malley

Mary O'Malley

Mary O’Malley is an author and counselor in Kirkland, Washington. In the early 1970’s, a powerful awakening set Mary on the path to changing her whole relationship with the challenges of life, freeing herself from a lifelong struggle with darkness. Since that time, Mary has taught extensively throughout the United States, Canada and Denmark. She is an inspirational speaker who leads retreats…

Your Vision of the future, lies from within

Gray Lawrence

Utility Warehouse Distributor

The greatest freedom is to be responsible. –Lazaris

Be Inspired by Glenda Watson Hyatt The Power of TRY

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"Don’t let others define you. Don’t let the past confine you. Take charge of your life with confidence and determination and there are no limits on what you can do or be." Michael Josephson

The Power of TRY

Glenda Watson HyattIf I could share 500 words to inspire, this is the important wisdom I’d want to pass along to others…

My message to the world comes down to one word: try.

In my lifetime, I have seen too many people afraid to try; too scared to try new things, to try new places, to try meeting new people. Watching them place needless limitations on themselves meant, sadly, watching human potential go wasted. Great ideas, solutions and relationships were never realized or even attempted because they were too reluctant to try. They feared what others may think, they doubted their own abilities or they feared what may or may not happen.

Yet, trying can be liberating, empowering, and even exhilarating.

Trying leads to discoveries – discovering abilities and strengths that you didn’t know you had, discovering your own beliefs and values, and discovering what the big, amazing world is all about.

Trying builds confidence and belief in yourself, even when others may doubt you.

Trying means starting, somewhere, anywhere, and then proceeding one step at a time, no matter how small the step seems.

Trying takes determination and perseverance. When you stumble and possibly even fail, stand up, brush yourself off and try again.

Trying entails taking risks and doing something you haven’t done before. With an appropriate degree of forethought, planning or support in place, take that next step. Was it as risky as you were worried about?

Trying involves solving problems. When one way doesn’t work, try another way and even another. Keep trying until the problem is solved or until it no longer exists.

Trying means stepping out of your comfort zone. What you find out there can be so rewarding, so glorious and so awe-inspiring. You may wonder why you stayed trapped within the confines of your comfort zone for so long.

Go ahead…try…see how far you can go, how much you can accomplish, how much you can become.

"We lift ourselves by our thought. We climb upon our vision of ourselves. If you want to enlarge your life, you must first enlarge your thought of it and of yourself. Hold the ideal of yourself as you long to be, always everywhere." Orison Swett Marden 1850-1924, Inspirational Writer

The Power is from within, the choice is yours

Gray Lawrence
Independent Distributor (UW)

"Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start." Nido Qubein

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