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5 Unique Ways to Forgive and Let Go

PMA added: 

A positive mental attitude is an irresistible force that knows no such thing as an immovable body.
Time and again we hear stories about ordinary people who do seemingly impossible things when they find themselves in an emergency situation. They perform herculean feats of strength and endurance, things they never dreamed they were capable of doing. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you could harness that strength and make it available anytime you need it? You can — if you believe you can. No doubt you can remember a time in your life when you were exceptionally focused on your objective, a time when you achieved more in less time than ever before. Perhaps it was an impending vacation that motivated you to get everything done before you departed, or perhaps it was a “must pass” exam that helped you focus your concentration. The intensity that you developed in those situations is always available to you when you have a Positive Mental Attitude.       Napoleon Hill

WRITTEN by MARC CHERNOFF

5 Unique Ways to Forgive and Let Go

“The past has no power over the present moment.”
―Eckhart Tolle

There is great value in every act of forgiveness.  You can forgive yourself, you can forgive others, and you can forgive even when you don’t know exactly who to forgive, because forgiveness is not about who is to blame or who is at fault.  It is about letting go, completely and permanently within yourself.

Forgiveness is recognizing the reality that what has happened has already happened, and that there’s no point in allowing it to dominate the rest of your life.  Forgiveness refreshingly cleans the slate and enables you to step forward.  Here are five unique ways to make this step possible:

1.  Stop trying for a while.

If you’re trying hard and haplessly making zero progress, stop trying.  Stop trying and start being.

When you see yourself as trying – to do something else or get somewhere else – you don’t interpret what you have and where you are as being good enough.  This perception of constantly trying makes living seem like an endless struggle.

There is great value within you right here, right now.  Allow it to come out, willingly and without a struggle.  Instead of trying to get to some other point in your life, give your full attention to doing your very best with the life you are living now.  Instead of believing that you are not there yet, be grateful that you are right where you are meant to be at this moment.

Yes, by all means set goals and take steps in the right direction, but don’t disregard the steps as you take them – these steps are your life’s story.  Let go of all the needless trying and let yourself take these steps peacefully and mindfully.  Let go of the judgments, forgive the past, and let this moment be as incredible as it is.  (This is something Angel and I discuss in the Adversity and Happiness chapters of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)

2.  Be the watcher of your thoughts and emotions.

In his best selling book, The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle tells us to be the watcher of our thoughts.  What he suggests is that instead of trying to change our thoughts – via gratitude or deliberate forgiveness, for example – we need to simply notice our thoughts without getting caught up in them.

You are ultimately the sole creator of your own feelings.  When negative thoughts arise based on past experiences or future worries, as they sometimes will, realize that these are simply issues your mind (not you) is working through.  Pause, be present and pay close attention.  Think about these thoughts and emotions consciously, almost as if you were a bystander looking in.  Separate yourself from your mind’s thinking.

Perhaps after you study your thoughts and emotions you will think to yourself, “Wow, am I really still working through that?”  And guess what?  Over time, your negative feelings and emotions will lessen and genuine awareness, love and acceptance will grow in their place.  You will begin to realize that your mind is just an instrument, and you are in control of your mind, not the other way around.

By not judging your thoughts or blaming them on anyone else, and merely watching them, there will be a big shift within you – your sense of self worth.

It’s not like you won’t get upset anymore or never feel anxious, but knowing that your thoughts and emotions are just fleeting feelings that are independent of YOU will help ease your tension and increase your positive presence, allowing you to forgive and let go.

3.  Love.

Feeling sorry for yourself and sabotaging the present moment with resentful thoughts of the past won’t make anything better.  Hurting someone else will never ease your own inner angst.

If you’re disappointed with yourself or frustrated with someone else, the answer is not to take it out on the world around you.  Retribution, whether it’s focused on yourself or others, brings zero value into your life.

The way beyond the pain from the past is not with vengeance, mockery, bullying or retaliation, but with present love.

Forgive the past, forgive yourself, forgive others, and love the present moment for what it’s worth.  There are plenty of beautiful things to love right now; you just have to want to see them.  Loving is never easy, especially when times are tough, yet it is easily the most powerful and positively enduring action possible.

If you’re feeling pain, don’t take action that creates even more pain.  Don’t try to cover darkness with darkness.  Find the light.  Act out of love.  Do something that will enable you to move forward toward a more fulfilling reality.  There is always something good you can do.  There is always love to give.  Fill your heart with it and act in everyone’s best interest, especially your own.

4.  Seek positive revenge by living well.

Are you contemplating revenge?  You know that’s negative thinking getting the best of you.  However, there is a way to seek revenge positively.

How?  Forget about them.  Remember you.  Working on a better you is more fulfilling than hanging on to contempt of others.  Let it all go and hold on to your growth and kindness instead.  If you train yourself to consistently be more loving in thoughts and actions, your positive energy will attract more positive results into your current reality.

Be unlike the person or situation that hurt you.  Let go and grow past your pain.  Carry on living well in a way that creates peace in your heart.  The energy you would spend trying to get real revenge can be better spent creating an amazing future for yourself.

The bottom line is that the best revenge is happiness, because nothing drives your adversaries more insane than seeing a fresh smile on your face.  (Read Buddha’s Brain.)

5.  Let go of the need to forgive every mistake.

Mistakes are the growing pains of wisdom.  Most of the time they just need to be accepted, not forgiven.

There is an obvious shift in your heart and mind that happens when you go from feeling hurt and upset to peaceful and loving, but it’s not necessarily forgiveness that’s taking place, it’s just the realization that there was nothing to forgive in the first place.

To help you wrap your head around this concept, try to look at your situation from 40,000 feet.  Imagine a more seasoned, wiser and more compassionate version of yourself sitting at the mountaintop of life, looking down and watching as the younger minded, current version of you hacks your way through life.

You see yourself holding on to false beliefs and making epic errors of judgment as you manoeuvre through life’s many obstacles.  You watch the children of the world growing up in challenging times that test their sense of self-confidence, yet they push forward bravely.  You see the coming generation radiating with passion and love as they fail forward, learning through their mistakes.

And you have to wonder:  Would this wiser version of yourself conclude that everyone in their own unique way was doing their very best.  And if everyone is trying to do their best, what needs to be forgiven?  Not being perfect?

Perfection doesn’t exist.  Forgiveness is oftentimes the simple realization that there is nothing that actually needs to be forgiven.

Your turn…

Who would you like to forgive?  What stressful burdens do you need to let go of and rise above? 

We will forget and forgive any judgment error that you make, but integrity mistakes are forever. — David Cottrell

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. Henry David Thoreau

Gray Lawrence Independent Distributor Utility Warehouse

"Forget mistakes. Forget failure. Forget everything except what you’re going to do now and do it. Today is your lucky day. -Will Durant

Our Character

“One has to feel defeat and loss before being reborn as a leader reborn for and with respect”                                                                                                        I am free to all that need me,  I am free to all that care, I am free to all of me for everlasting learning’s I am free to you always.

OUR CHARACTER IS SHOWN BY…
The jokes we CHOOSE to share…and not to share.
The derogatory terms we CHOOSE to use…and refuse to use.
The promises we CHOOSE to break…and the ones we keep.
The rumours we CHOOSE to spread…and those we ignore.
The resources we CHOOSE to waste…and those we use wisely.
The lies we CHOOSE to tell…and not to tell.
The responsibilities we CHOOSE to accept…and those we shirk.
The courtesies we CHOOSE to extend…and fail to extend.
The efforts we CHOOSE to put forth…and not put forth.
The quality we CHOOSE to provide…and the corners we cut.
The information we CHOOSE to share…and that which we hoard.
The listening we CHOOSE to do and not do.
The respect we CHOOSE to give…and fail to give.
The helpful hands we CHOOSE to extend…and those we keep in our pockets.

"The grateful mind is constantly fixed upon the best. Therefore it tends to become the best. It takes the form of character of the best, and will receive the best." Wallace D. Wattles

“The Power of Listening is available to us all, only those who listen will gain great benefits in life, love personal & financial wealth. The decision is yours” Gray Lawrence

The Power is from within, the choice is yours
Gray Lawrence
Independent Distributor (Utility Warehouse)                                             
"Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start." Nido Qubein

Personal Development: WHY?

From The Secret Daily Teachings

No person or power in the outside world can compare to the power you have within you. Seek the power within, as it knows the perfect way for you. May the joy be with you. Rhonda Byrne

Personal development is sometimes referred to as self-development or personal growth, and it traditionally covers a broad set of areas to improve. It is not however something that you gain from formal education, though the process of gathering knowledge is fundamental to growth. Personal development is a path that you take to better your family situation, career, spirituality, emotional health, and every other aspect of your life. It is the investment into improving yourself. Essentially, It is about making conscious decisions about everything that you do, the way that you think, and the way that you react to situations. For some, It is also a matter of moving beyond past failures and misfortune to see what is possible in the future.

Development process

Personal development can help you obtain everything that you always dreamed of, and more, with the simple application of a few simple mind-sets and tools. Our awareness is a direct result from our development. And personally, the need for further growth and development is paramount for your health physically, mentally and emotionally through to all your relationships. For those who need additional help moving past obstacles and making those changes, a counsellor or personal development coach can also be of great worth. One of the most important steps toward development is to set obtainable goals.

Setting Goals

Finding resources to make changes move past obstacles, set goals, and find happiness is not always easy. Search for quotes stories, tips and ideas to fuel your goals. The key is to consciously act toward goals that will cause you to grow. You must then determine which values, goals and principles you will set up to guide your actions. For me I choose to remove all the bad programming that has been installed on my "hard drive" (if you will) and install more productive and positive programming to help me move closer to my goals in life. You can also learn how to set and implement realistic goals, develop an increased level of self-esteem and self-confidence.

Keys to Growth

I’ve found out more about myself by committing myself to personal growth, rather than trying to find myself first and then start developing. I also found that my personal growth plan is a useful tool that keeps me focused. Develop your personal growth plan, make it a visual poster and hang it up where you can see it daily. Success in an undertaking leads one to gaining more pursuit and a much greater yearning to learn, resulting in growth of motivation directing towards the goal that you have set.

Self Development is a journey not a destination.

"I believe that the very purpose of our life is to seek happiness". Personal development is not about reaching a state of perfection; it’s about enjoying the process. It is about living your life while making conscious decisions on a daily basis about everything you do. Make no mistake about it; personal development is a lifelong pursuit. Remember that it is your key to success and you must make a commitment to practice it daily to see results.

The key in making those right choices. Each choice you make is like a length of steel wire. By itself, it’s not that big a deal, but when braded together, when compounded with all the other choices you make, these lengths of wire form a thick cable of awesome strength and power. Nothing is stronger than habit – Ovid

The Power is from within, the choice is yours
Gray Lawrence
Independent Distributor (Utility Warehouse)                                     
"Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start." Nido Qubein

THE IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE

Life says, “Make good or make room, but don’t make excuses.”
In today’s management parlance, “Lead, follow, or get out of the way.” When you are actively working toward a goal, there are no failures; there are only degrees of success. Choose to be a leader. Take the initiative. When you are faced with a problem or a difficult decision, don’t waste endless hours agonizing over the solution. If you analyse the situation objectively, you will always find an answer. Don’t focus on the problem; focus on the solution. Then get into action. As W. Clement Stone has often said, “The emotions are not always subject to reason, but they are always subject to action!” – Napoleon Hill

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." John F. Kennedy

imageA philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about 2 inches in diameter

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "Yes."

"Now," said the professor, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things – your family, your partner, your health, your children – things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter – like your job, your house, your car.

The sand is everything else. The small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued "there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have

Room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal.

Take care of the rocks first – the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

 

imageThe Power of Simplicity – that is what the story demonstrates. If I may add my two cents worth… the story underlines the need to give priority to the IMPORTANT over the URGENT. Once the Important is in place, we can attend to the Urgent. If we fail to do that, we become perpetual slaves to the great tyrant called Urgent.

 

Your life is a learning process – you can only become wiser from learning. Sometimes you might have to attract making a painful mistake to learn something important, but after the mistake you have far greater wisdom. Wisdom cannot be bought with money – it can only be acquired through living life. With wisdom comes: strength, courage, knowing, and an ever-increasing peace. May the joy be with you, Rhonda Byrne

 

Dreams are difficult to build and easy to destroy. – Seth Godin

Gray Lawrence

Focus on the WHY of life and not the HOW, remembering that where focus goes, energy flows – Gail Lynne Goodwin

Be Inspired by Dr. Linda Berry

PMA Added only:

"Remember that no matter what the difficulty is, no matter where it is, no matter who is affected, you have no patient but yourself; you have nothing to do but convince yourself of the truth which you desire to see manifest." Charles Haanel

The 5-Fold Path to Bliss: Go Beyond Stress to Renewal

 

Topics: Bliss, stress relief

If I could share 500 words to inspire, this is the important wisdom I’d want to pass along to others…

Ancient Taoists discovered how to make bliss happen. And modern science validated the landing sites for chemicals that create bliss. Stress blocks bliss.

Like many, I’ve had significant stress. Growing up in an alcoholic family, I was sad most of my life … Then I had my dream life as a dancer and choreographer!

But at 24 years old, it was ripped away from me when I crashed through a windshield smashing my spine. When I woke up, I was paralyzed from the waist down.

With long years of effort, I’ve overcome those obstacles to enjoy glimmers of bliss. You can too by following this simple path. It empowers anyone to achieve blissful moments of union with the divine.

1. Eliminate Irritants: Irritants come in many forms: chemical, emotional, physical, sexual, environmental, mental, and spiritual. Irritants damage your health and well being. To achieve bliss, you must identify what’s irritating you and eliminate it. But sometimes you can’t. Sometimes you must accept what is and come to peace with its presence in your life to feel happiness.

2. Nourish Yourself: What’s nourishing to you may irritate another. Nourishment comes on many levels. Food, drink, art, beauty, and nature, are all forms of nourishment. The company that you keep can benefit you or drag you down. The way you feed your senses, your spirit, and your mind also adds to or subtracts from owning ecstasy.

3. Get Comfortable in Your Body: Growing up Catholic, I read about saints’ lives. Some suffered terrible pain yet still knew religious ecstasy. Not many can do that. To get comfortable in your body, you need to do more than get out of pain. Society is jammed with messages that you’re not OK. Getting comfortable in your body means feeling you’re OK however you are.

4. Use Your Natural Resources: You have three power plants in your body: your heart, your smile, and your sexuality. How do you feel when something makes you happy? Aren’t you charged up when you feel love? Throughout the ages religions try to control sexual expression because of its power. Yet systems of enlightenment use sexual power to grow the spiritual self. Use your natural resources to grow bliss.

5. Love, Admire, and Respect Yourself and Others: Do unto others as you would have others do unto you is the Golden Rule. But what about recognizing your success? You deserve admiration for all you’ve accomplished. Would you act the way you do if you treated yourself with respect? Give love, admiration, and respect to others … and also to yourself to expand into moments of bliss.

“If you let your background keep you from moving forward you will always be a background singer.” – Derrick Hayes

 

The Power is from within, the choice is yours
Gray Lawrence

Independent Distributor

Utility Warehouse

"Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start." Nido Qubein

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Gray Lawrence

grayjl63@gmail.com

Skype: graynat71

Ph: +44 1522 691508
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