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THE IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE

Life says, “Make good or make room, but don’t make excuses.”
In today’s management parlance, “Lead, follow, or get out of the way.” When you are actively working toward a goal, there are no failures; there are only degrees of success. Choose to be a leader. Take the initiative. When you are faced with a problem or a difficult decision, don’t waste endless hours agonizing over the solution. If you analyse the situation objectively, you will always find an answer. Don’t focus on the problem; focus on the solution. Then get into action. As W. Clement Stone has often said, “The emotions are not always subject to reason, but they are always subject to action!” – Napoleon Hill

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." John F. Kennedy

imageA philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about 2 inches in diameter

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "Yes."

"Now," said the professor, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things – your family, your partner, your health, your children – things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter – like your job, your house, your car.

The sand is everything else. The small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued "there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have

Room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal.

Take care of the rocks first – the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

 

imageThe Power of Simplicity – that is what the story demonstrates. If I may add my two cents worth… the story underlines the need to give priority to the IMPORTANT over the URGENT. Once the Important is in place, we can attend to the Urgent. If we fail to do that, we become perpetual slaves to the great tyrant called Urgent.

 

Your life is a learning process – you can only become wiser from learning. Sometimes you might have to attract making a painful mistake to learn something important, but after the mistake you have far greater wisdom. Wisdom cannot be bought with money – it can only be acquired through living life. With wisdom comes: strength, courage, knowing, and an ever-increasing peace. May the joy be with you, Rhonda Byrne

 

Dreams are difficult to build and easy to destroy. – Seth Godin

Gray Lawrence

Focus on the WHY of life and not the HOW, remembering that where focus goes, energy flows – Gail Lynne Goodwin

Natural Selling Feed Back Lesson Six the last but one

 

You can’t control others’ acts, but you can control your reaction to their acts, and that is what counts most to you.
No one can make you feel any negative emotion — fear, anger, or inferiority — without your express permission. There will always be people who find perverse enjoyment in upsetting others, or who simply play upon your emotions so that they can use you for their own selfish purposes. Whether or not they are successful depends entirely upon you and how you react to their negative behaviours. When you are forced to deal with such people, recognize from the outset that they are trying to upset you, not because of something you may have done to them, but because of some problem they have with themselves. Tell yourself, “This isn’t about me. I will not allow this person to upset me. I am in control of my emotions and my life.” Napoleon Hill

The Importance of Feedback

Today, we look at the 4th Principle and a very important part of the Natural Selling Approach.

The fourth Principle Feeding Back What You Think You Heard

Leading a team being carried on an arrow the way aheadTo ensure continual understanding, feeding back or clarifying what you think you heard, is something you will learn to do on a constant basis throughout your dialogue, making sure that you’re on the right track, using phrases like…

"Let me repeat that to make sure I understand what you’re saying" or * "Would you go over that again to make sure I understand…?"

Don’t take anything for granted as you progress.

If you don’t understand something, ask for it to be repeated.

Think about the saying; "I know you think you know what I said but what I said is not what I really meant!"

Also, summarizing what you think you heard gives the other person the opportunity to correct any misunderstandings. Words and phrases can often mean different things to different people.

Remember, we are all individuals and we each have our own view of the world!

A cloud does not know why it moves in just such a direction and at such a speed, it feels an impulsion.. This is the place to go now. But the sky knows the reasons and the patterns behind all clouds and you will know too, when you lift yourself high enough to see beyond horizons.                            From the book Illusions.

The ultimate feedback is at the end of your conversation when you are presenting your solution. This is the time when you are in a position to summarize what a person has, what they are looking for and why they want it and how you can help them get it by offering your solution. If you feedback, recap and present this based on everything they told you, you will have truly demonstrated a complete understanding.

And people love people who understand them. It’s extraordinary what people will tell you if you listen to them. Why? Because you’ll be one in a million who does listen, and if you do it with love and care, you become a very valuable person.

In fact, you create value in you and everything you represent with your ability to ask questions, listen and feedback.

listening takes practice and it takes patience  but I promise if you listen your story will be better for itThe point is that by not focusing on selling your solutions services, but focusing on discovering and understanding problems and getting behind them first, to see whether you can help, and whether the other person is prepared to be helped, you will both see people’s challenges more clearly.

As well, when you understand what a person is really looking for and why they want it you will be able to customize your solution and present it so that it personally means something to them.

The last lesson number seven! we will review the material we have covered and take a look at the next step.

Exercises:

Call centre group in circle1. Think about a time you might have found yourself in when you were talking with someone and you realized that you had been talking "at cross purposes". They meant something completely different from what you thought they did? Think about how that happened and the consequences of it.

2. When you’re talking with people today, make a point of feeding back to them what they are saying to you. Don’t overdo it!

Especially ask for clarification with words or phrases they might use that are unfamiliar to you.

3. Go to a busy restaurant and listen closely to two people talking.

Observe whether their conversation is on the same track or whether they are having two or more different conversations!

If it’s two or more, ask yourself whether you do the same thing and if you do, what you can do to correct it.

Know yourself! Watch how you manifest the small things in life and think about how you felt inside with those things. Think about how easily they came. You will find that you thought of a small thing once and never thought about it again, and then it manifested.

What really happened was you didn’t think any thoughts or speak any words which contradicted what you wanted, so the law of attraction was able to do its work.

May the joy be with you, – Rhonda Byrne The Secret

I was never afraid of failure, for I would sooner fail than not be among the best. John Keats

Gray Lawrence Successful Networker

Choose to be optimistic, it feels better." – Dalai Lama

Natural Selling lesson Four

The game of business is very much like the game of tennis. Those who fail to master the basics of serving well, usually lose. — Unknown

There is only one boss–the Customer. And he can fire anybody in the company from the chairman on down, simply by spending his money somewhere else. — Sam Walton

 

Silouette door sales

This lesson, we’re going to talk more about how to approach potential partners and customers using the magic and power of dialogue…a way of connecting with people at a deeper level than can be achieved just by telling or through conversation.

It’s based on 3 more principles of the Natural Selling Approach that we will cover in a moment.

We learned in the previous lesson that the Natural Selling Approach is a Problem Solving Exercise.

To do this you simply find out if people have the sort of problems that you can help them solve by:

1. Asking simple questions

2. Listening

3. Feeding back and responding to the answers to constantly make sure both of you are on the same track.

Doing this while suspending your agenda is the magic behind and power of dialogue. When you suspend your agenda, you allow others to openly reveal theirs without yours getting in the way.

Let’s look at this in the form of a principle… the 2nd one of four.

Principle 2. Asking the Right types of Questions at the Right Time

As you have seen, the conventional way of telling people about you, your company or your products, usually will result in rejection and objections.

It’s the Law of Giving and the Cause and Effect working against you!

So how to turn this around?

The key is not to tell, present, convince, persuade, manipulate or pressure someone to buy something or take action. It’s about asking questions and listening and effectively responding and allowing your potential partners and customers to convince themselves to change

Now, we’re not talking about manipulative or leading questions that are designed to get the answers you want to hear. If you use these questions whose answers are you likely to hear? Your own!

Whose answers and truth do you really want? Theirs!

While manipulative questions can be very powerful there are drawbacks to using them:

* People know when they are being manipulated and don’t like it

* Using them is uncomfortable for most Network Marketers and

Direct Sales People who tend to resist using them and end up

doing nothing.

* They are not effective for long term results.

While it’s possible to temporarily motivate people to do something, there is a very interesting phenomenon that takes place. After a short while they stop being motivated and stop doing what they agreed to do.

This behaviour is called passive aggression or buyer’s remorse.

You can see the effect of this when customers stop buying from you, or people drop out from your organization. This is usually because they came on board for your reasons, not theirs. This is the number one cause of the high customer and team attrition rate.

The Natural Selling Approach dramatically changes this.

The questions you use are intended to help the other person uncover and talk about the difference between what they have and what they would like based on their own inner and external values, without you having to guess or make a judgment.

After all, who has the history of what is, and has been, going on in their life, and what they want and why they want it? They do!

Small daily improvements are the key to staggering long term resultsYour potential partner or customers and you each bring a key thing to the Approach. On the one hand, they have their history and know what they want… they have the answers. You, on the other hand, know the potential of your products or income opportunity, and whether it can work for them based on the answers they give you. When you get a match, which will happen most of the time, you’ll then be able to explain your solution to them so that it all makes sense. So all you need are the right types of questions!

You also need to know when to ask them.

The Natural Selling Approach uses a "Dialogue/Conversation Framework" that explains what the types of questions are and when to use them to help you and the person you are talking with see clearly:

1. Whether they have the type of problems that your solution can help them solve

2. If they do, the depth of those problems.

3. Whether there is enough desire for them to want to do something.

Questions help people open their minds. Questions involve people. They allow people to think about their present situation, themselves and their problems.

Helping People Inspire Themselves to Change

The Natural Selling Approach is not about you persuading them, it’s about allowing people to persuade themselves as they come to see what is right for them.

While bias-free communication takes on going effort, it will help you build a This is how it works.foundation of trust with your listeners.                              — Leslie C. Aguilar

This is how it works.

As people respond to your questions they also listen to themselves. They;

1. Internalize what they say

2. Feel the discomfort of their present circumstances (and if things are not working as well as they would like) 3. Decide to make a change.

Their answers help them think about their problems and to own the idea that they want to change if their problems and internal motivation is great enough.

It gives meaning to the saying "When I say it, they can doubt me.

When they say it, it’s true."

The degree a person will change depends on two things;

1. The degree of discomfort they feel in the present moment as they talk about their present circumstances, and their;

2. Degree of their desire to move toward their dream

If you get out of your own way and listen to them, and are not hasty to come up with your solutions too quickly, they will listen to you.

Asking questions eliminates the need for you to present and learn closing and objection handling techniques. Because who eliminates all the objections in the Dialogue? They do, because they are the ones talking and revealing how they feel about their problems and internally motivating themselves to make a change.

The "Sale is Made" in the Discovering!

Learning how to ask the "Right Types of Questions at the Right Time" will prepare a person to be receptive to your solutions.

Before you speak THINKEssentially, they "sell themselves" on the idea of wanting to change and when you offer the idea of a potential solution, they are receptive to it.

The "sale" then is actually made during the uncovering and revealing a person’s needs, where they talk and listen to themselves into changing.

It’s when you have asked enough questions, responded appropriately to their answers, discovered there is a need to make a change and that the other person is open to changing, that you propose you might know of a solution that might help them.

The Natural Selling Approach can take two minutes or it can two years! It really depends on the other person and where they are in their lives.

One thing is guaranteed. If you don’t rush them and put your Personal Agenda on the shelf and let it guide you not manipulate you, if there is a sale to be made, you will make it every time.

Next we will take a close look at the other most powerful communication tool available to you – Listening.

The Secret

There is a difference between feeling gratitude and appreciation for something, and feeling attachment to something. Appreciation and gratitude are states of pure love, while attachment contains fear – fear of losing or not having what you are attached to. When it comes to something you want in your life, appreciation and gratitude attracts, and attachment pushes away. If you are feeling afraid that you will not get what you want, or losing what you have, then you have attachment.  To remove the attachment, keep shifting yourself into a state of appreciation and gratitude, until you can feel that the fear has gone. May the joy be with you, Rhonda Byrne

Exercises:

1. Have you ever experienced "Buyers Remorse"? Think about the situation and what happened. Did you ever do business with that person or organization again?

2. Start a Dialogue with a stranger or someone you know by asking them a question and continue asking them questions. Remove your Personal Agenda.

Just listen and ask questions based on the answers you get to your previous questions, or on something that comes to your mind.

Don’t talk about you or your ideas, or make comments. Just gently focus on asking questions. If you’re asked a question, briefly answer it and follow your answer with a question of your own.

See how "deep" you go exploring a particular issue. Observe your own feelings and how the other person is feeling.

Your thoughts ceate your future

To thine own self be true; to your success…

"Energy is the essence of life. Every day you decide how you’re going to use it by knowing what you want and what it takes to reach that goal, and by maintaining focus." Oprah Winfrey

The Power is from within, the choice is yours
Gray Lawrence
Successful Networker


"Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start." Nido Qubein

Successful Networker Natural Selling First Lesson

Do not worry at all about negative thoughts, and do not try to control them. All you have to do is begin to think good thoughts each day. Plant as many good thoughts as you can in each day. As you begin to think good thoughts you will attract more and more good thoughts, and eventually the good thoughts will wipe out the negative thoughts altogether.

May the joy be with you,

Rhonda Byrne

I am not what happend to me I am what I chose to become Introduction and Lesson 1.

Rejection, Objections and  What Causes them

Do You Make This Mistake When Talking With Potential Clients Or Partners?

 

The intention and objective of this course to help you to discover 2 things;

1. Why conventional sales thinking, techniques and systems;

* Are ineffective for most Network Marketers and Direct Sales People

* Actually cause the objections and rejection Network Marketers would prefer not to have.

* Is the reason for the high team and customer attrition rate.

2. How you can do something different or reverse this if you’re already using techniques and achieve the results for you and your team by adopting a different approach called the Natural Selling Approach.

There are 7 lessons over the coming weeks, you will receive a lesson and also some short exercises to illustrate the lesson. You’re encouraged you to complete those exercises. They will help you "absorb and understand" the ideas and concepts that are written here.

Negative emotions are like unwelcome guestsLesson #1

The Way You Think and Communicate Will Determine The Way People Respond To You

Ask yourself this. What is the greatest fear you might have that could hold you back from talking with people about your income opportunity or products?

If you are like most it will be the fear of rejection and objections and the anxiety that comes with that.

Two Types of Rejection

There are two types of rejection;

1. The flat in your face "Not interested" or "You must be joking" type of rejection; and

2. The type where someone has looked at your solution and finds it doesn’t really fit what they need.

The second one can be disappointing but it doesn’t necessarily feel personal. So this training program is about item 1 and understanding the cause of rejection and how to eliminate it by getting rid of the cause and replacing it with something entirely different.

The Cause of Rejection

Have you considered that if you do have feelings of anxiety about talking with people about your Income Opportunity and/or Products…it could be the way you have chosen to communicate, or think you have to communicate, that is causing this?

Life is full of choices and what you choose to think, say or do, will reflect how other people will think, say or do in response to you.

Let’s start by exploring closely the underlying causes of rejection and objections.

This is a better approach than just launching off by telling you what you should do. If we did this, then would you agree that this training approach would not be any different than all the standard ones that tell you what to do using techniques and systems without any explanation as to why?

Besides, if you understand the cause of a problem first, you’re now in a better position to think and do something different that will eliminate it.

2 key things to grasp:

What you do right now will have accumulated an effect on tomorrow1. People do things for their reasons not yours. They are motivated by their personal interest and own subjective reasons.

You may have heard this referred to as the "What’s In It For Me?"  syndrome

2. Most people resist being "told" what to do (even if they ask you!) or being persuaded to do things, and generally like to learn and understand before taking action on changing anything.

So it’s important when you hear someone express a problem or need, want or desire, such as a need for money or good health, that you’re not tempted to launch in with a "fire hose"

presentation before talking about and discovering why they want it and the history behind how they came to be in these situations.

There is no such thing as a "one size fits all" presentation that basically "tells" a person what our solutions are and what they can do for them.

We are all unique in how we see, hear and feel about things. If you take the one size fits all view, (usually your view) then rejection and objections is usually the natural consequence of that.

The truth is, it doesn’t matter much what you think about your solutions and whether they are going to work for someone. What’s important is what the other person thinks.

So if you start your conversations by overpowering people and coming up with your solutions too early, most people will withdraw. Then you have to resort to using conventional selling techniques of objection handling, closing and mental strategies to overcome the rejection you created in the first place! It also makes selling a "numbers game" of ploughing through as many people as you can that requires a great deal of effort and time.

People suffer because they  are caught in their views release them and suffer no moreSo it’s important to help people surface what they know and don’t know and what they want by allowing them to come to their own conclusions.

Observe your own experiences. Have you ever been in a situation where you asked someone for a solution to a problem and they started with the words, "You know what you should do…?" Did you feel resentful or annoyed, even though you asked for help?

If you did, it’s probably because you didn’t feel involved and your own uniqueness and knowledge was not being acknowledged.

It’s the same for most people.

People like to do things for their reasons not yours!

The Natural Law of Giving

The Law of Giving works like this. What you give is what you get.

Other people’s actions and words are a reflection of your actions and words.

It’s like a smile. If you smile at someone they will usually smile back.

This is the Law of Giving working for you.

The key to using the Law of Attraction is within your four powers: Your thoughts, emotions, visualizations and actions." Frank Mangano

However, this natural law can work against you if you put pressure on others by telling, presenting or persuading people to do things you want them to do. Result? Most people will tell you back! How? By one or more of three

ways:

1. Rejection

2. Objections

3. Passive Aggression. (When people say they will do something and don’t!) This is also called "Buyers Remorse".

In selling, if you want the Law of Giving to work for you and have people listen to you and your solutions, then listen with the intent to understand them first.

Lesson two is looking at how you can do this and build your team and customers with effortless ease based on solid principles and methods that work… all the time!

Exercises

1. Reflect on how you feel when a salesperson, charity solicitor or telemarketer tries to get you to do something.

2. Think about your reaction when you see an advertisement on TV or in print. If you paid attention to it, why is that?

Doing these exercises will help you understand and use the material in the following lessons.

To your success…

"Mentors are guides. They lead us along the journey of our lives. We trust them because they have been there before. They embody our hopes, cast light on the way ahead, interpret arcane signs, warn us of lurking dangers and point out unexpected delights along the way. " ~L.A. Doloz

The Power is from within, the choice is yours
Gray Lawrence
Successful Networker

"Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start." Nido Qubein

Revolving Map
Contact Information
Gray Lawrence

grayjl63@gmail.com

Skype: graynat71

Ph: +44 1522 691508
Mob:+44 7726591314
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