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20 Hard Things You Need to Do to Be Happy

PMA Added…

 

From The Secret Daily Teachings

The fastest way to become the Master of your thoughts and emotions is ,through challenging situations. If your life is going along fairly smoothly, there are not the same opportunities that enable you to strengthen your power and become the Master of your thoughts and emotions.                    You see, even challenges are beautiful opportunities in disguise.

May the joy be with you,  Rhonda Byrne
The Secret… bringing joy to billions

 

WRITTEN by MARC CHERNOFF

20 Hard Things You Need to Do to Be Happy

There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.

You have to do hard things to be happy in life.  The things no one else is doing.  The things that frighten you.  The things others can’t do for you.  The things that make you question how much longer you can hold on and push forward.

Why?

Because those are the things that define you.  Those are the things that make the difference between existing and living – between knowing the path and walking the path – between a life of mediocrity and a life filled with happiness and success.

Of course, the hard things are often the easiest things to avoid.  To procrastinate.  To make excuses.  To pretend like they somehow don’t apply to you and your life situation.

But reality always rears its head in the end.  And the truth about how ordinary people achieve immense happiness and incredible feats of success is that they step out of their comfort zones and do the hard things that their more educated, affluent and qualified counterparts don’t have the courage, drive or determination to do.

So for your own sake, start doing the hard things TODAY.  I guarantee, you will be blown away at just how remarkable you really are and just how amazing life can be.  Here are some ideas to get you started:

  1. You need to take small chances every day. – It’s the best way to face any problem, crush every fear and overcome life’s greatest challenges.  And you get just about as many chances in life as you’re willing to take.  So never let your fear decide your future.  Take small chances every day, one step at a time.  Some will work out and some won’t.  But good choices or bad, if you never take these chances, someone else will build your life for you.  And you don’t want that.
  2. You need to worry less about what other people think of you. – A beautiful life is about spending your time passionately, being happy with who you are inside, and not worrying about everyone’s petty judgments.  If you want to achieve greatness, stop asking for everyone’s approval.  You don’t need anyone’s approval to be happy or to follow your heart.
  3. You need to ignore what everyone else is doing and achieving. – Your life is about breaking your own limits and outgrowing yourself to live YOUR best life.  You are not in competition with anyone else; plan to outdo your past, not other people.
  4. You need to invest in yourself even when no one else is. – Truth be told, there are only a few people in this world who will stay 100% true to you, and YOU should be one of them.  Prioritize your own needs into your daily to-do’s.  Invest in your education, health and happiness every single day.  Create a life that feels good on the inside, not one that just looks good on the outside to everyone else.  (Read Choose Yourself!)
  5. You need to walk the talk. – Do not ask others or the universe to guide your footsteps if you’re not willing to move your feet.  If you really want it, prove it!  Happiness will come to you when it comes from you.  Success will be yours when you take responsibility for making your goals a top priority.
  6. You need to put your heart into your work. – Love is a verb.  Act on it.  Put your heart into goals that move you.  Work hard.  In the end, love is what makes you smile when you’re tired and still struggling.
  7. You need to deliver results, even when making excuses is easier. – NO shortcuts.  NO quick fixes.  NO blaming others.  NO “I’ll do it tomorrows.”  NO MORE EXCUSES!  Just get started.  Quit talking and begin doing!  Laziness may appear attractive, but work leads to happiness.
  8. You need to make mistakes and look like a fool sometimes. – Quite often, the successful people who act the happiest are the ones who have overcome the most.  Sometimes you have to lose something precious in order to gain something priceless.  Never regret your past mistakes and failures, because they have given you strength.  The one who falls and gets up is much stronger than the one who never fell.
  9. You need to let go of yesterday’s struggles. – The story of your life has many chapters.  One bad chapter doesn’t mean it’s the end.  So stop re-reading the bad one already and turn the page.  Accept what is, let go of what was and have faith in what could be.  Remember, life does not have to be anywhere near perfect to be wonderful in the end.
  10. You need to refrain from feeling sorry for yourself. – To those who are struggling, I understand how rough things are right now.  I just want to let you know that things will get better, I promise.  Keep pushing forward.  I know you feel like nobody really cares, but you’re wrong.  People care.  I care, otherwise I wouldn’t be writing this.  You’re not alone.  We may be miles apart, but we’re all going through similar challenges.  Realize that self-pity is not helpful.  Life is not about feeling sorry for yourself.  It’s about forgiveness, acceptance and looking forward to what makes you stronger and better off in the long run.
  11. You need to toughen up. – The strongest, happiest, most successful people are NOT those who always win, but those who don’t give up when they lose. They fail forward.  So keep calm when everything seems to be going wrong.  You may feel weak, but your spirit is strong.  When things are tough, you must be tougher.  Don’t pray for an easy life; pray for the strength to endure a hard one that leads to long-term success and happiness.
  12. You need to fight hard for what you believe in. – Great strength comes from overcoming what others believe is impossible.  And sometimes you have to lose the battle to win the war.  So if you believe strongly in something, fight for it.  In time things will fall into place… maybe not today, but eventually… maybe not exactly how you planned, just how it’s meant to be.  (Angel and I discuss this in more detail in the “Adversity” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)
  13. You need to be patient. – Don’t rush it.  Practice patience.  Keep a good attitude while working hard for what you believe in.  When the time is right, it’ll happen.
  14. You need to take control of your thoughts before they take control of you. –It’s often our own thinking that hurts us.  Realize this.  You can’t solve your problems with the same thinking you used to create them.  There’s no reason to imprison yourself.  Don’t think outside the box.  Think like there is no box.
  15. You need to be positive. – Happiness is in the heart and mind, not in random circumstances.  Beautiful things happen when you distance yourself from negative thinking.  Be positive and smile right now, not because everything is good, but because you can see the good side of everything.  Smiling doesn’t always mean you’re happy; sometimes it simply means you’re strong.  And smiling will help you feel better.
  16. You need to spend more time with the right people. – And if you know the people around you aren’t the right people, you need to change the people around you.  It’s not easy, but it’s worth it.  Don’t expect to see positive changes in your life if you surround yourself with negative people.  Don’t give part-time people a full-time position in your life.  Know your value and what you have to offer, and never settle for relationships that always bring you down.
  17. You need to stand up for yourself. – Some people will do anything for their own personal gain at the expense of others – cut in line, take money and property, bully and belittle, pass guilt, etc.  Do not accept this behaviour.  Do not let people walk all over you.  Most of these people know they’re doing the wrong thing and will back down and apologize surprisingly quickly when confronted.  In most social settings people tend to keep quiet until one person speaks up, so SPEAK UP.
  18. You need to forgive everyone who has wronged you. – Kindness is not to be mistaken for weakness, nor forgiveness for acceptance.  It’s about knowing that resentment is not on the path to happiness.  Remember, you don’t forgive people because you’re weak.  You forgive them because you’re strong enough to know that people make mistakes.  (Read Loving What Is.)
  19. You need to reach out and help people. – The closest thing to being cared for is to care for others.  We are all in this together and we should treat each other as such.  Your beliefs alone don’t make you a better person, your behaviour does.  Use your voice for kindness, your ears for compassion, and your hands for charity, always.  You don’t need a reason to help someone else.
  20. You need to be present enough to enjoy your journey. – Find your balance between planning and presence.  When life is good, enjoy it.  Don’t go looking for something better every second.  Happiness never comes to those who don’t appreciate what they have.  You must be willing to loosen your grip on the life you have planned so you can enjoy the life that is waiting for you in this moment.  It may not be everything you want for your future, but it’s everything you need right now.

 

“You create your life through the inner power of your being, whose source is within you and yet beyond the selves that you know. Use those creative abilities with understanding abandon. Honour yourselves and move through the godliness of your being.” Jane Roberts

 

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. Eleanor Roosevelt

Gray Lawrence

 Utility Warehouse Distributor

The greatest freedom is to be responsible. – Lazaris

Your Key to Success and Leadership Development

Success doesn’t come to you – you go to it. — Marva Collins

Your Key to Success & Leadership Development

You have to make mistakes to find out who you aren’t. You take the action, and the insight follows: You don’t think your way into becoming yourself.” —  Anne Lamott

10 things to do and be effective

An advantage we all have is the ability to control what we do each day. We can improve our productivity, or not! You decide.  In too many cases, we are the only ones who know when we are falling short of our best level of performance. It’s no surprise that many managers have no idea  regarding the difference between mediocrity and excellence.

clip_image001Effective people have the Key to the secret of success, which is to “Take Action”  Like many of the top performers!    You must keep your driving the pace until  you take flight.

Here are 10 things that effective people do

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  • Starting early. Sam Walton arrived to work at 3 am. Perhaps a little early for many of us, but we need to get an early start. “The early Bird” 
  • Accepting good and bad news as part of moving on!  As you progress up the ladder, you will be in the line of fire, so remember who you pass on the way up!  Because what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.
  • Having a long term perspective. Never thinking about short term gains, thus focusing on building a strong successful foundation success.
  • Avoiding the petty and uninteresting information.  It is counterproductive to spread rumours, be disrespectful or talk bad about colleagues and never criticizing management. Its much better to focus on the task ahead and the results it will bring.
  • Always be professional. Do not lose control. You want others to describe you as a “professional person.” This is the compliment we all strive for thus reaching an important milestone.
  • Focusing on the key areas that bring the results you are aiming for!  At the next meeting, observe and study the leaders of your organization and how they focus on what the important issues are. They have the ability to identify the problems as the professionals they are.
  • Treating others with respect, we are not better, but we have a different look on matters and may have accomplished more in certain areas, we must always appreciate what others bring to the table.
  • Be humble, we do not know everything. We must be open to working in teams.  When we put our minds together, we can tackle enormous projects, which lead to huge benefits for the organization.
  • Confront problems!  Address immediately. Those who are excellent performers are aware of small problems and prevent them from escalating. Taking a proactive approach is preferred.
  • Be committed to sharing the wealth and knowledge. Rewarding those who do well, as we are not solely responsible for the huge accomplishments. Be humble, and praise others publicly and privately when they contribute to our goals and initiatives.
  • Successful people are extraordinary in the sense that they understand the importance of knowledge, commitment, and humility. The process to greatness is well established but realizing it requires significant effort.

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Developing good habits takes time, more work and effort than most are willing to commit. But for the top 10%, this commitment is unwavering. 

“Excellence is not a singular act, but a habit.  You are what you repeatedly do!!” ~ Shaquille O’Neal

He who loses wealth loses much; he who loses a friend loses more; but he that loses his courage loses all. – Miguel de Cervantes

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. Eleanor Roosevelt

Gray Lawrence

Utility Warehouse Distributor

The greatest freedom is to be responsible. – Lazaris

Selling by Seth Godin

PMA Added.. Personally I prefer not to sell but offer..

“Success lies just one inch beyond your perceived limits. Every day you have a choice whether or not to take that inch and transform success from uncertainty to inevitability.” – Akshay Nanavati

 

Selling to people who haven’t bought yet

The portion of the population that haven’t bought from you or your competition yet is not waiting for a better mousetrap.

They’re not busy considering a, b and c and then waiting for d.

No, they’re not in the market. They don’t believe that they have a problem that’s worth the time and money they think it’s going to take to solve it.

As a result, smart marketers don’t market to this audience by saying, "hey, ours is better than theirs!"

If this group thought that they had a solvable problem, the would have solved it already.

No, they won’t respond to a better-than-them pitch. Instead, they’re much more likely to respond to a new statement of their problem and a new statement of the solution. Don’t ask them to announce that they were wrong when they decided that they didn’t need a tablet, a survival kit or an anti-impotence drug. Instead, make it easy for them to make a new decision based on new information.

 

The easiest and the best

The easiest customers to get are almost never the best ones.

If you’re considering word of mouth, stability and lifetime value, it’s almost always true that the easier it is to get someone’s attention, the less it’s worth.

 

If you think that’s what we want, why don’t you give it to us?

The sign in front of the breakfast bar at the hotel says, "from garden to table."

Really? Virtually every item I see has been processed four times, steamed, stored and steamed again.

Marketing pitches are finely tuned to resonate with the audience in mind. Too often, though, the marketer is only in charge of the pitch, and someone else in the organization has to make the thing.

So the marketer brags about how tasty the food on the airplane is, or how reliable the cell phone service is or how magically transporting the aromatherapy of the soap is–and then someone else, someone under different pressures and constraints–has to deliver. And they rarely do.

They rarely do because the paying customer isn’t their customer. Their customer is the quality control department, the accounting department and the "don’t-rock-the-boat" department.

Marketers need to spend less time making promises and more time keeping them.

 

The future of our economy lies with the impatient. The linchpins and the artists and the scientists who will refuse to wait to be hired and will take things into their own hands, building their own value, producing outputs others will gladly pay for. Seth Godin

 

Your Vision of the future, lies from within

Gray Lawrence

Independent Distributor  (UW)

The greatest freedom is to be responsible. -Lazaris

Are you out of control..

"Happiness cannot be travelled to, owned, earned or worn. It is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude." Denis Waitley

 

It’s completely normal to feel out of control when something goes wrong in your life.
In fact, it’s probably safe to say that it’s not normal to feel completely at peace when something unfortunate happens.
But even though it feels like all the hard work you’ve put in, all the sacrifices you’ve made, and all the life you’ve lived has done nothing to prevent you from experiencing tragedy, there is always hope for those who are willing to fight to

"When we feel significant emotional highs and happiness for what we have in our lives, we effectively send out a signal to the universe that we want more of what we are experiencing." Dr. Steve G. Jones

take control of their lives once again with hope for a better day.

If you’ve been struggling with the difficulties of life, it’s time to open your mind to a few new ideas that will help you take control of your life, fill your life with positive energy, and help you recover from your negative experiences, one day at a time.

Bad things can happen in the blink of an eye or they can occur progressively over a long period of time. One moment you are happily smiling at your fortune and everything good in your life, and the next moment something unexpected happens and you wonder how you are going to pick up the pieces of your life that have been left behind by a devastating series of events.

"The reason why it is so important to be in control of your thoughts is because your thoughts shape who you are and your perspective on life." Frank Mangano

It’s completely normal to feel out of control when something goes wrong in your life. In fact, it’s probably safe to say that it’s not normal to feel completely at peace when something unfortunate happens. But even though it feels like all the hard work you’ve put in, all the sacrifices you’ve made, and all the life you’ve lived has done nothing to prevent you from experiencing tragedy, there is always hope for those who are willing to fight to take control of their lives once again with hope for a better day.

If you’ve been struggling with the difficulties of life, it’s time to open your mind to a few new ideas that will help you take control of your life, fill your life with positive energy, and help you recover from your negative experiences, one day at a time.

Make it a Priority to Serve Others

Be a leader not a followerIt seems like every time something bad happens in my life, everyone tells me to forget about myself and go find someone else that needs my help. When I first began trying this technique, I felt frustrated, sorry for myself, and absolutely no motivation to lift others burdens when my life seemed so horrible. Over time my opinion changed, and now I look forward to helping others whenever I get the chance, especially if I’m in the middle of a rough patch in my life. There is just something about helping others that seems to take your problems away. You begin to focus more on loving others, and less on your own misfortunes.

Learn What the Universe Has in Store For You

Whether we want to admit it or not, there are bigger forces at play in the Universe than just ourselves. Sometimes you may not think experiencing a natural disaster, the death of a loved one, or prolonged unemployment will provide you with any benefit at all, but it’s entirely possible that the Universe is preparing you for something much bigger, a greater life responsibility than even you can comprehend at this point in time. If you think that’s the case, try to find out what that purpose and responsibility is, and seek after it.

Enjoy the Adventure of Your Life

Your life is your story and the venture ahead of you..Despite what others may believe, there is no reason to fear the future. If you look at life as one big adventure, you’ll realize that life will provide you with twists and turns that you won’t expect—some of them will be happy, and others might be sad, but that’s the best part of living. If you knew everything would always work out the way you want it to, you would get bored of your life. The greatest joy I’ve experienced in life is triumphing when all the odds were stacked against me and I was facing great adversity. It made achieving my dreams and goals all the sweeter, because I alone knew what I had to overcome to get where I wanted to be. The same will be true of you if you enjoy the ride of life, with all of its speed bumps and stop lights.

"Whatever it is you are achieving vibrational harmony with is what you are living. If you ever want to know what the vibrational content of your outpouring is, just look at the manifesting around you, because the manifesting around you is always a perfect vibrational match to the vibration that is dominant within you." Abraham Hicks

Your Vision of the future, lies from within

Gray Lawrence

Independent Distributor  (UW)

The greatest freedom is to be responsible. -Lazaris

 

Forgiveness or No Forgiveness, The Choice is Yours

This wonderful message comes from Seth Godin.  A writer I love to hear from through his blogs. I have only added some PMA for an extra touch.

“Attitude is everything, young or old!”  Gray Lawrence

When access to information was limited we needed to load students with facts. Now, when we have no scarcity of facts, or the access to them, we need to load them up with understanding. Seth Godin

Has anyone ever said or done anything unforgivable to you? Something so awful you know you can never forgive them?

Probably this strikes a bell with most of my readers. It would certainly be rare to find someone who has never been mistreated, never misunderstood, never abused in one way or another. In some cases the abuse may have been particularly nasty. Something you would much rather forget, but find you cannot.

Does this person deserve your forgiveness? Probably not. Should you forgive them? Absolutely!

Why do I say this? If they don’t deserve your forgiveness, why should you forgive them? Am I trying to turn you into a saint or something?

No. I am not saying this to make you a “goody goody”. And I am certainly not suggesting you should allow anyone to take advantage of you. So why I am saying it?

The reason is that I believe you deserve to be free. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be able to do whatever you wish in life and not be weighed down carrying a load dumped on you by someone else.

If there is anyone you have not forgiven for what they have done or said to you this means you are allowing that person to control your life. You are giving them the ultimate victory over you. Is that what you want? If not, you simply have to find a way to forgive them.

Some of you may now be saying “it’s all very well for you to say that, but you don’t know how I have suffered! You cannot understand just how bad this was!”

I agree I cannot know what it is like to suffer in the way you may have suffered. To use a common Christian saying, we each have our own cross to bear. The one you are bearing may be far heavier than mine. But even though I cannot understand just how bad it was for you, what I do understand is that you are now carrying an unnecessary burden. Just like “Christian” in John Bunyan’s “Pilgrim’s Progress”. Christian was carrying a burden so heavy he could hardly move. So are you if there is someone you have not forgiven. Your happiness is marred because every so often you think of this unforgivable thing that was done to you and it spoils what would otherwise be a lovely moment in a lovely day. Why not simply throw that burden away? It is not stuck to you with superglue. You have chosen to carry it. Now you should choose to throw it away.

There may be others who will say “but there is nobody I haven’t forgiven! Nobody has done anything particularly bad to me!” If so, you are very fortunate! But I would suggest there are probably some slights, some grievances, some humiliations that your conscious mind has forgotten but are still bubbling away somewhere under the surface. You do not feel desperately unhappy, but because there are some unforgiving words and actions loitering in your unconscious mind what could be a really happy moment is, instead, just mildly pleasant. These unforgiving things are stopping you reaching your full potential. They are controlling you.

Would you like to free yourself of this burden? Great!

The first thing you must do is find all the actions and words you have not yet forgiven. Some may be easy to find. Others will be hiding under the surface. Sit quietly and let them come to you.

Now, for each unforgiving act or word find the person. Picture that person in your mind. Say to them “I forgive you”. At first you will probably feel silly. But don’t worry about that. Nobody is watching you. Nobody is laughing at you. This is something you are doing for yourself so you can be happier.

As you do this you will find a part of your mind will tell you that this person does not deserve your forgiveness. You can immediately dispel that thought by saying “they may not deserve it, but I am forgiving them for me, not for them!” This other part of your mind may say it was totally wrong of them to do this to you. Respond by saying “I am not the one who will judge them for it, and I am not asking them or anyone else to do this again to me, I am just letting go so this act no longer controls me. I forgive!”

If you are a Christian you should remember the phrase in the Lord’s Prayer “Forgive me my wrongdoings as I forgive those who have done wrong to me”? Whether or not you are a Christian this is a phrase I would like you to remember and use. When you forgive others you will find that forgiveness of yourself comes quite naturally too. But give it a helping hand anyway. Add your own wrongdoings now. See them clearly and then forgive yourself. As long as you have forgiven others you should find you are now able to forgive yourself. When you do you really should find you feel light and buoyant. You have let go of your burden.

Try to perform this act of forgiveness every day. I suggest you do it last thing at night before you go to sleep, as you should find your sleep will then be that much more refreshing. Try it, let go, don’t allow anyone to control you any more and see just how much difference this makes in your life!

I may add the following: should you the reader be the person to improve and or agree to what Seth wrote, may I be the first to congratulate you on being a good person..

Try to be like the turtle – at ease in your own shell. – Bill Copeland

Anything in life that we don’t accept will simply make trouble for us until we make peace with it. Shakti Gawain

Your Vision of the future, lies from within

Gray Lawrence

The greatest freedom is to be responsible. –Lazaris

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Gray Lawrence

grayjl63@gmail.com

Skype: graynat71

Ph: +44 1522 691508
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