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REGRET IS NOT YOUR FRIEND

Optimism

We can learn from our leaders of the past. Thomas Edison’s great optimism gives us a quintessential example of welcoming disaster. On a December night in 1914, fire broke out in the film room of Thomas Edison’s laboratory. As his assets were going up in smoke, it would seem that this sixty-seven-year-old man’s spirit would certainly be crushed. Instead he saw the fire and shouted to his son, “Where’s Mom? Go get her! Tell her to get her friends! They’ll never see a fire like this again!” Later, he said,

“You can always make capital out of disaster.
We’ve just cleared out a bunch of old rubbish.
We’ll build bigger and better on the ruins.”

Thomas Edison could not control the circumstances. Rather than being heartbroken to see his life’s work go up in flames, he chose to welcome the opportunity to start over. Edison, known for his overwhelming optimism, is an inspiration for us today.

Do you live with regrets?  Are you able to put regret behind you easily?

Regret Is Not Your Friend

There are two sides to regret.

The first side involves regret for actions or events we wish had not happened and we would like to take back. We have all said or done things we regret. We may get upset and say things that damage our relationships or we may do things that cause harm. For example, Tiger Woods may regret his unfaithful conduct in his marriage.

I have done many things over my life that I regret, from investing in a scam to getting involved in a risky business venture to help out a friend. However, my regrets are now infrequent. Why? I took the time to identify the main causes of my actions and rooted them out. I had to learn to take responsibility for my contribution to my own troubles and to make values-based decisions, conducting myself in way that leaves little room for regret.

What about you? Think about the times when you felt regret. Is there a common theme? Do behaviours or habits contribute to your regret? What new thoughts or action steps could reduce your feelings of regret for the things you have said or done?

For the most part, the first type of regret can be tempered by time.

The second side of regret involves regret for actions not taken. This is the sin of omission. We must take this side of regret even more seriously because we cannot alter time to retrieve things that were missed: the job we did not take, the investment we ignored, or the opportunity we let pass by. The list can be long.

When I achieved the milestone birthday of 50 years, I felt a greater sense of urgency about all the things I wanted to do, despite my plan to live to 100+. I knew that it was my time to take action.

With keen awareness that mortality is universal and non-negotiable, I want to encourage every individual reading this article to take a stand:

“Starting today, I will live my life without regret, especially as it pertains to activities I want to experience and outcomes I wish to realize in my life.”

Here are a few areas you might wish to consider avoiding missing out on (and then later regretting):

§ Attending your child’s recital or concert

§ Beginning a regular fitness program

§ Travelling to that place you have been dreaming about for years

§ Taking that course to upgrade your skills—perhaps even getting the degree you have been contemplating

§ Trying a new food

§ Taking time for yourself

§ Quitting a job you hate

§ Calling a friend to share coffee or lunch

§ Attending the presentation or concert of someone (or group) you enjoy

§ Writing the article, poem, or book you’ve had percolating for ages

§ Joining the community group you’ve been thinking about

Unless material goods are directly linked to what you want to do or become, please don’t focus on them here. Yes, you can keep a list of the “things” you want to own, but putting a new painting on your wall may not be as meaningful as taking a vacation and having quality time with your family.

When have you said, “If only I had…?” Think about it for a moment. What do you wish you had done or become? What are you going to do about it? At this point, remorse won’t get you where you want to go; forward action will. Forget your excuses and make a decision to live your life without regret.

A research study conducted on individuals over 70 years of age asked participants these questions:

“If you could live your life over again, what would you do differently? What do you regret?”

The responses showed the following results:

§ They would take more time for themselves.

§ How many times have we met people who dedicated their whole life to others, at the expense of their own needs and goals?

§ They would take more risks.

§ This is the “if only” part of regret. “If only I had bought the property, taken that job, said ‘no’ to…” and on the story goes.

§ They would dedicate themselves to a cause or purpose that would last beyond their lifetime.

§ What’s your legacy? What will you be remembered for? Will you even be remembered at all?

A life lived without regret is living on purpose and making a difference, whatever the context. How do you rank yourself on a scale of 1 to 10? [1 = Poor (plenty of regret); 10 = Excellent (little or no regret)]

Let’s all strive to be as close to 10 as we can in all areas of our lives! Start now. No regrets, please!

ACTION STEPS:

1. List events in the past that have caused you to experience the most regret.
Is there a common theme or set of situations where regret is recurring for you? What do you think the root cause(s) might be? What can you do to reduce your regret?

2. Think about all the things you regret not
What are your reasons for not taking action—lack of courage, not feeling worthy, compromising your values for others, etc.?

3. Make a list of things you can start doing immediately to reduce your regrets.
Don’t make excuses for what you can’t do. Focus on what you can and will

4. Make a commitment to follow your list of actions.

5. Move on with confidence.

6. Confirm your passions and connect with your purpose to reduce your regrets.

7. Read my newest book, The Quest For Purpose. It will take you on a personal journey of discovery to help you confirm and affirm your passions in life.

8. Benchmark your gifts, talents, and passions by using CRG’s assessments.
Your results will assist you to establish your beliefs with confidence, and increase your passion in all areas of your life.

Remember, our mortality is guaranteed. To those of you who are still procrastinating, I suggest you get started with your no-regrets philosophy this very moment. When you have no regrets, then you are truly living On Purpose!

Gray Lawrence

“The point is not to live without any regrets it is to not hate ourselves for having them..” Gray Lawrence

THE IMPORTANT THINGS IN LIFE

Life says, “Make good or make room, but don’t make excuses.”
In today’s management parlance, “Lead, follow, or get out of the way.” When you are actively working toward a goal, there are no failures; there are only degrees of success. Choose to be a leader. Take the initiative. When you are faced with a problem or a difficult decision, don’t waste endless hours agonizing over the solution. If you analyse the situation objectively, you will always find an answer. Don’t focus on the problem; focus on the solution. Then get into action. As W. Clement Stone has often said, “The emotions are not always subject to reason, but they are always subject to action!” – Napoleon Hill

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." John F. Kennedy

imageA philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about 2 inches in diameter

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "Yes."

"Now," said the professor, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things – your family, your partner, your health, your children – things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter – like your job, your house, your car.

The sand is everything else. The small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued "there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have

Room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal.

Take care of the rocks first – the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

 

imageThe Power of Simplicity – that is what the story demonstrates. If I may add my two cents worth… the story underlines the need to give priority to the IMPORTANT over the URGENT. Once the Important is in place, we can attend to the Urgent. If we fail to do that, we become perpetual slaves to the great tyrant called Urgent.

 

Your life is a learning process – you can only become wiser from learning. Sometimes you might have to attract making a painful mistake to learn something important, but after the mistake you have far greater wisdom. Wisdom cannot be bought with money – it can only be acquired through living life. With wisdom comes: strength, courage, knowing, and an ever-increasing peace. May the joy be with you, Rhonda Byrne

 

Dreams are difficult to build and easy to destroy. – Seth Godin

Gray Lawrence

Focus on the WHY of life and not the HOW, remembering that where focus goes, energy flows – Gail Lynne Goodwin

This Touched me from a friend with a heart. Enjoy

PMA Added to a wonderful message for all peoples..

The world is full of miracles. They stand in shinning silence next to every dream of pain and suffering, of sin and guilt. They are the dream’s alternative, the choice to be the dreamer, rather than deny the active role in making up the dream.- Miracles

The stuff of which you are made is so charged with the ability to create that everything you touch comes to life; every thought, every identity, every image. – the Starseed transmissions

There was a blind girl  who hated herself because she was blind.

She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend.  He was always there for her.

She told her boyfriend, “If I could only see the world, I will marry you”.

One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her.  When the bandages came off, she was able to see everything, including her boyfriend.

He asked her, now that you can see the world, will you marry me? “

The girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind.  The sight of his closed eyelids shocked her.  She hadn’t expected that.  The thought of looking at them the rest of her life led her to refuse to marry him.

Her boyfriend left her in tears and days later wrote a note to her saying: “Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for before they were yours they were mine.”

This is how the human brain often works when our status changes.

Only a very few remember what life was like before,and who was always by their side in the most painful situations.

Life is a gift

Today before you say an unkind word,  Think of someone who can’t speak.

Before you complain about the taste of your food – Think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about your husband or wife- Think of someone who’s crying out to ALMIGHTY GOD for a companion.

Today before you complain about life;

think of someone who died to young.

Before you complain about your children;

Think of someone who desires children but they are barren.

Before you argue about your dirty house someone did not clean or sweep;

Think of the people who are living in the streets.

Before whining about the distance you drive;

Think of someone who walk’s the the same distance with their feet.

And when you are tired and complain about your job;

Think of the unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your job.

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another;

Remember that not one of us is without sin and we all answer to one MAKER.

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down; put a smile on your face and thank GOD you are alive and still around.

And before you think of closing, Please think of sending this to as many people as you like… It might change someone’s thinking towards LIFE.

Remain Blessed..Always. from  a dear and thoughtful friend.

From The Secret Daily Teachings

It is so important that you are grateful for everything in your life. Many people focus on the one thing they want and then forget to be grateful for all the things they have. Without gratitude you cannot achieve anything through the law of attraction, because if you are not emanating gratitude from your being, then by default you are emanating ungratefulness. Be proactive and use the frequency of your being to receive what you want.    May the joy be with you,  Rhonda Byrne
The Secret… bringing joy to billions

Every event that you chose for your life, no matter how destructive, chaotic or miserable it may seem, has been allowed to manifest because your Wholeness has an innate knowledge of those things you need to get you to the place where you will chose to sink deep within, into the stillness of who you are. – Bartholamew

 

Gray Lawrence

Independent Distributor

Utility Warehouse

Winning in life is more than just money; it is about winning on the inside and knowing that you have played the game of life with all you had, and then some!

A Positive Story for YOU! From Karina in California

 

PMA Added only!

Don’t blame children who are bad. Blame those who failed to discipline them.
Ralph Waldo Emerson once observed, “Our chief want in life is somebody who will make us do what we can.” Although children doubtless do not recognize it at the time, they crave discipline, particularly during their formative years. Discipline defines boundaries for them, provides security, and is an active expression of a parent’s love. Most important, it prepares them for the challenges of adulthood. If your childhood was less than perfect, you are in good company. Most of us have experienced difficulties at one time or another, and we all make mistakes from time to time. The good news is that while your environment as a child will have a profound influence upon the person you become, it is not the sole determinant. The person you choose to be is entirely up to you. Only you can decide who and what you will become in life. Napoleon Hill

I Loved Myself For The First Time  Karina in California

An Inspirational Story, look deep inside yourself while reading this passage

There is one power within you that is stronger than any other power. This power is the Supreme Power! When you use this power it will dissolve all chaos, it will wipe out all negativity, and it will cut through every single situation, unfailingly. Any situation of negativity in your life is simply the absence of this one almighty power. You can rely on it to obliterate every negative thing, because nothing can stand up against it. You can use it on yourself or anyone else, and the more you use it, the more powerful it becomes. You have an unlimited source of this power, which is the most magnetic substance in the entire Universe…

This Supreme Power within you is Love. Send it outwards, send it inwards, and then stand back and watch what happens to your life…

From Karina in California – ‘I Love Myself For The First Time’

I sit here in tears of joy!

I don’t remember how I attracted The Secret to me… I know I wanted to buy it for my sister and a friend for Christmas so they could "find themselves", and I ended up getting one for me and just started reading it. Not realizing that I was the one who needed to find myself.

My husband and I had decided that having me stay home to take care of the kids was better for them. Loved the first few months, but then I started devaluing myself, feeling depressed, unappreciated. By then I had started watching my niece, so I had two toddlers to take care of and an 8 year old. My niece and son started being so bad, my son was hitting, my niece would cry all day, and I was going insane! Depressed, hating my life, myself, and many times had thoughts of ending my life.

One night I was reading The Secret, the part about loving ourselves. I closed my eyes and saw myself hugging myself and loving me! Might sound weird, but that is how I visualized it. I cried, because I had never felt that much love for myself! I had always battled with weight issues. But I now love myself so much, and accept myself, and I shall ask and I shall receive!

The Secret has changed my life! I didn’t realize how much negative energy I have had around me all my life! And I cry to realize that my kids behaviour wasn’t them – it was me!! I was bringing all this negative energy around me and them!

Now they are the sweetest little angels, they listen, don’t hit, they only cry when they fall, etc. The relationship with my husband is better than ever, because when he compliments me I know it’s true. Before I wouldn’t believe, but now I know it is true!

I know this is just the beginning of my true life! I am thankful for all involved in making The Secret. It all makes sense now!

How True

The Power is from within
Gray Lawrence


"Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start." Nido Qubein

Be Inspired by Anita Laughlin

PMA Added

.Abundance is not something we aquire but something we tune to          Abundance is Powerful

 

Making Art Out Of Life

If I could share 500 words to inspire, this is the important wisdom I’d want to pass along to others…

Relationships have the brilliant power to inspire. To be inspired is to breathe in and out with the joyous certainty that you are loved for who you are. My favourite  poet, Pablo Neruda, wrote metaphorically about the inspired individual in one section of his epic poem entitled “The Great Ocean”:

The wave that you let loose,
Arc of identity, exploded feather
When it was unleashed, it was only foam,
And without being wasted came back to be born.
All of your strength returns to its beginning…….
What was expelled by the action of your abundance,
All that was left of its clustered fruit of being
Your statue casts its shadow far beyond the waves.

Your own “arc of identity” forms for you as a child. Embrace the poet in you –whether you are young or old– the poet lives inside. Instil the love of language into your own children with unending rolls of crisp white paper and create rhyming words to wrap your arms around, twirling in circles, dancing and chanting together.

Paint a portrait of your children as you see them, perhaps clothed in kelp hiding inside an underwater coral castle. Art can bring you closer to the heart of your child.

Practice things that are difficult for you –model the struggle for your child, whether you are braiding a lattice of dough on a rhubarb pie or learning to fly-fish. It is the process of learning that is important. Learn by doing.

Respect the need for solitude. Imagination requires solitude from time to time.

Read and reflect. Treasure the stark imagery of Sylvia Plath and Wallace Stegner, embrace the haunting stories of Eudora Welty and Flannery O’Connor, laugh out loud at children’s’ poet Jack Prelutsky as he describes cooking a turkey filled with exploding popcorn kernels. Be free with your laughter. Laugh with your family.

Value companionship. The poet Rumi wisely wrote: “Companionship is helpful, because patience expands your capacity to love and feel peace.” Value the creativity of the companion in your life and your relationship will be enriched. Original piano sonatas and improvisational jazz fill our house daily, teaching me the power of music to unlock the abundance of our emotions. Express your love.

Friendship inspires courage. An old friend, Daphne, lived alone in a small house in rural Maine with her cat Liquorice and an upright piano which seemed to sprout sheets of music like daisies. Having cerebral palsy since birth, Daphne walked with a stoop and despite arthritic fingers, practiced piano daily. To the end, her voice was joyful and her insights penetrating. She died as she lived –a whole person who inspired others to love the world with courage.

Experience gratitude for the moments in the life of your family and friends that are heart-opening and expansive beyond measure. And give thanks for the first snowfalls and the lavender sunsets that splash into the sea.

“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.”  – Regina Brett

“Don’t wake up in the morning resentful of the day ahead. Smile and hear your soul, clearly saying, ‘Thank you for my adventure – where shall we go today?’” – Susan Sosbe

 

Gray Lawrence

To achieve great things requires no great effort, just a modest effort repeated again and again. Start right now by improving one little corner and you’re on your way to change the world.

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Contact Information
Gray Lawrence

grayjl63@gmail.com

Skype: graynat71

Mob:+44 7726591314
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