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REGRET IS NOT YOUR FRIEND

Optimism

We can learn from our leaders of the past. Thomas Edison’s great optimism gives us a quintessential example of welcoming disaster. On a December night in 1914, fire broke out in the film room of Thomas Edison’s laboratory. As his assets were going up in smoke, it would seem that this sixty-seven-year-old man’s spirit would certainly be crushed. Instead he saw the fire and shouted to his son, “Where’s Mom? Go get her! Tell her to get her friends! They’ll never see a fire like this again!” Later, he said,

“You can always make capital out of disaster.
We’ve just cleared out a bunch of old rubbish.
We’ll build bigger and better on the ruins.”

Thomas Edison could not control the circumstances. Rather than being heartbroken to see his life’s work go up in flames, he chose to welcome the opportunity to start over. Edison, known for his overwhelming optimism, is an inspiration for us today.

Do you live with regrets?  Are you able to put regret behind you easily?

Regret Is Not Your Friend

There are two sides to regret.

The first side involves regret for actions or events we wish had not happened and we would like to take back. We have all said or done things we regret. We may get upset and say things that damage our relationships or we may do things that cause harm. For example, Tiger Woods may regret his unfaithful conduct in his marriage.

I have done many things over my life that I regret, from investing in a scam to getting involved in a risky business venture to help out a friend. However, my regrets are now infrequent. Why? I took the time to identify the main causes of my actions and rooted them out. I had to learn to take responsibility for my contribution to my own troubles and to make values-based decisions, conducting myself in way that leaves little room for regret.

What about you? Think about the times when you felt regret. Is there a common theme? Do behaviours or habits contribute to your regret? What new thoughts or action steps could reduce your feelings of regret for the things you have said or done?

For the most part, the first type of regret can be tempered by time.

The second side of regret involves regret for actions not taken. This is the sin of omission. We must take this side of regret even more seriously because we cannot alter time to retrieve things that were missed: the job we did not take, the investment we ignored, or the opportunity we let pass by. The list can be long.

When I achieved the milestone birthday of 50 years, I felt a greater sense of urgency about all the things I wanted to do, despite my plan to live to 100+. I knew that it was my time to take action.

With keen awareness that mortality is universal and non-negotiable, I want to encourage every individual reading this article to take a stand:

“Starting today, I will live my life without regret, especially as it pertains to activities I want to experience and outcomes I wish to realize in my life.”

Here are a few areas you might wish to consider avoiding missing out on (and then later regretting):

§ Attending your child’s recital or concert

§ Beginning a regular fitness program

§ Travelling to that place you have been dreaming about for years

§ Taking that course to upgrade your skills—perhaps even getting the degree you have been contemplating

§ Trying a new food

§ Taking time for yourself

§ Quitting a job you hate

§ Calling a friend to share coffee or lunch

§ Attending the presentation or concert of someone (or group) you enjoy

§ Writing the article, poem, or book you’ve had percolating for ages

§ Joining the community group you’ve been thinking about

Unless material goods are directly linked to what you want to do or become, please don’t focus on them here. Yes, you can keep a list of the “things” you want to own, but putting a new painting on your wall may not be as meaningful as taking a vacation and having quality time with your family.

When have you said, “If only I had…?” Think about it for a moment. What do you wish you had done or become? What are you going to do about it? At this point, remorse won’t get you where you want to go; forward action will. Forget your excuses and make a decision to live your life without regret.

A research study conducted on individuals over 70 years of age asked participants these questions:

“If you could live your life over again, what would you do differently? What do you regret?”

The responses showed the following results:

§ They would take more time for themselves.

§ How many times have we met people who dedicated their whole life to others, at the expense of their own needs and goals?

§ They would take more risks.

§ This is the “if only” part of regret. “If only I had bought the property, taken that job, said ‘no’ to…” and on the story goes.

§ They would dedicate themselves to a cause or purpose that would last beyond their lifetime.

§ What’s your legacy? What will you be remembered for? Will you even be remembered at all?

A life lived without regret is living on purpose and making a difference, whatever the context. How do you rank yourself on a scale of 1 to 10? [1 = Poor (plenty of regret); 10 = Excellent (little or no regret)]

Let’s all strive to be as close to 10 as we can in all areas of our lives! Start now. No regrets, please!

ACTION STEPS:

1. List events in the past that have caused you to experience the most regret.
Is there a common theme or set of situations where regret is recurring for you? What do you think the root cause(s) might be? What can you do to reduce your regret?

2. Think about all the things you regret not
What are your reasons for not taking action—lack of courage, not feeling worthy, compromising your values for others, etc.?

3. Make a list of things you can start doing immediately to reduce your regrets.
Don’t make excuses for what you can’t do. Focus on what you can and will

4. Make a commitment to follow your list of actions.

5. Move on with confidence.

6. Confirm your passions and connect with your purpose to reduce your regrets.

7. Read my newest book, The Quest For Purpose. It will take you on a personal journey of discovery to help you confirm and affirm your passions in life.

8. Benchmark your gifts, talents, and passions by using CRG’s assessments.
Your results will assist you to establish your beliefs with confidence, and increase your passion in all areas of your life.

Remember, our mortality is guaranteed. To those of you who are still procrastinating, I suggest you get started with your no-regrets philosophy this very moment. When you have no regrets, then you are truly living On Purpose!

Gray Lawrence

“The point is not to live without any regrets it is to not hate ourselves for having them..” Gray Lawrence

Your Key to Success & Leadership Development

“You are one of a kind and perfection all on your own. To know your sustenance is to know you are expanding now, always, in all ways, always and ever!” – Meichelle McClellan

Your Key to Success & Leadership Development

You have to make mistakes to find out who you aren’t. You take the action, and the insight follows: You don’t think your way into becoming yourself.” —  Anne Lamott

10 things to do and be effective

An advantage we all have is the ability to control what we do each day. We can improve our productivity, or not! You decide.  In too many cases, we are the only ones who know when we are falling short of our best level of performance. It’s no surprise that many managers have no idea  regarding the difference between mediocrity and excellence.

 

clip_image001Effective people have the Key to the secret of success, which is to “Take Action”  Like many of the top performers!    You must keep your driving the pace until  you take flight.

Here are 10 things that effective people do

  • clip_image003Starting early. Sam Walton arrived to work at 3 am. Perhaps a little early for many of us, but we need to get an early start. “The early Bird” 
  • Accepting good and bad news as part of moving on!  As you progress up the ladder, you will be in the line of fire, so remember who you pass on the way up!  Because what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.
  • Having a long term perspective. Never thinking about short term gains, thus focusing on building a strong successful foundation success.
  • Avoiding the petty and uninteresting information.  It is counterproductive to spread rumours, be disrespectful or talk bad about colleagues and never criticizing management. Its much better to focus on the task ahead and the results it will bring.
  • Always be professional. Do not lose control. You want others to describe you as a “professional person.” This is the compliment we all strive for thus reaching an important milestone.
  • Focusing on the key areas that bring the results you are aiming for!  At the next meeting, observe and study the leaders of your organization and how they focus on what the important issues are. They have the ability to identify the problems as the professionals they are.
  • Treating others with respect, we are not better, but we have a different look on matters and may have accomplished more in certain areas, we must always appreciate what others bring to the table.
  • Be humble, we do not know everything. We must be open to working in teams.  When we put our minds together, we can tackle enormous projects, which lead to huge benefits for the organization.
  • Confront problems!  Address immediately. Those who are excellent performers are aware of small problems and prevent them from escalating. Taking a proactive approach is preferred.
  • Be committed to sharing the wealth and knowledge. Rewarding those who do well, as we are not solely responsible for the huge accomplishments. Be humble, and praise others publicly and privately when they contribute to our goals and initiatives.
  • Successful people are extraordinary in the sense that they understand the importance of knowledge, commitment, and humility. The process to greatness is well established but realizing it requires significant effort.

clip_image005Developing good habits takes time, more work and effort than most are willing to commit. But for the top 10%, this commitment is unwavering. 

 

“Excellence is not a singular act, but a habit.  You are what you repeatedly do!!” ~ Shaquille O’Neal

 

 

Gray Lawrence.

Whatever you send out is what you draw back in. Take the responsibility for the thoughts and emotions you send out, for they go into the universe and create and create the events and circumstances that come back to you. – Orin

Be Inspired by by Debra Keirce

PMA ADDED only..

Having a great dream and belief in yourself is great, but nothing happens until you take action.

Your thoughts  create your future and your attitude is what makes you.  gray Lawrence

Dare to DREAM BIG

Debra KeirceIf I could share 500 words to inspire, this is the important wisdom I’d want to pass along to others…

Do it.
Dare to dream.
Dream big.
Dream the details.
Imagine the day when your dream comes true.
Surround yourself with people who support your dream. In turn, support them in their dreams.

In this way, you will succeed. Be willing to sacrifice, and be willing to walk away from those who criticize or distract. Be generous and loving in your pursuits. Lift others up because you know that your biggest assets in this journey are the love and support of those around you. Let go of anyone who tries to hold you back. Do not judge, and do not allow yourself to be judged. Keep your eyes on the prize. It doesn’t matter whether people understand your intentions. It doesn’t matter if you fail in your first attempts. You will fail in your first attempts. The journey will be full of unexpected turns and amazing adventures. Take time to thoroughly enjoy achievements along the way. The biggest dreams are full of the biggest joys, the deepest disappointments and the most adversity. Through it all, keep an unrelenting focus on your goals.

“Dream” is a verb. It is an act that starts with a single thought. It’s not something that happens to you. It’s not a story you can watch play out on its own. It is not a description of something attained by a privileged few. It’s not a reward for being in the right place at the right time. Dreaming requires your active participation. Plan for success. Structure that single thought in a unique way that describes joy, contentment, peace, happiness and success for you on a very personal level. Nurture and feed that thought so it can grow. Chance opportunities will present themselves, but don’t rely on chance. Rather, be prepared to forge ahead when doors open for you. If you dare to dream, be tenacious in pursuit of that dream. Invest yourself heart and soul.

Even before you reach your goals, you will inspire people to set their own. With every challenge that knocks you down, people will see you as a Luminary when you get back up and soldier on.

If you want to change the world in a positive way, dream with passion.

See the path to the finish line as your life’s journey. And when one dream ends, celebrate and start a new one. Show us how it’s done. Simply, dream. Do it.

Debra Keirce is an internationally collected artist who lives in Northern Virginia, USA. Debra paints from life, photo references, and her imagination. Her paintings are very realistic, but her subject matter is nothing that exists for you to readily photograph. For this reason, her art is often referred to as hauntingly familiar. Art critic Brian Sherwin, Editor of The Art Edge, commented on Debra’s still life paintings. Sherwin said, "Artist Debra Keirce approaches her still life paintings with a playful sense of surrealism. The work I observed appears to capture a dream-like quality. This quality is heightened by Debra’s love of unique still life arrangements." For Ms. Keirce, being an artist is the continuation of a dream that started in Detroit in 1978 when she was 17 years old. That was the year she decided to live a life of magic, and seemingly improbable, if not impossible, goals. She decided then and there to become a chemical engineer. She later left engineering to raise a family when she was on the verge of being promoted into management, raise three children as a stay at home mom, and began a successful career as a professional fine artist. And, the dream continues.

Ask, Believe, Receive – just three simple steps to create what you want. However, very often the second step, believe, can be the most difficult one. And yet it is the greatest step you will ever take. When you master believing, you have mastered your life.

To master believing, all you have to do is tip the balance of your thoughts, words, and actions, from ‘not believing’ to believing. The ONLY thing that can ever get in the way of manifesting what you want, is having more thoughts of ‘not believing’, speaking more words of ‘not believing’, and taking more actions of ‘not believing’, than you are of believing. Base the majority of your thoughts, words, and actions in believing, and the law of attraction must obey you.  Rhonda Byrne “The Secret”

Gray Lawrence

“The Power is from within, the choice is yours.”

Attitude and The Power of One

”People build too many walls and not enough bridges.” – Isaac Newton

An area of importance to us all, should we decide to be better

Getting the best from yourself and others all starts with one: one thought … one word … one action.


Activities010[1]“One” is the first note in orchestrating the personal attitude that shapes and directs your life – and impacts the members of your team. Contrary to the lyrics from a classic rock song, one is not the loneliest number. It’s the most important one!
Your thoughts, words, and actions are like individual notes that work in concert to create the power of one person – YOU – to make a difference. You can harness your “power of one” if you simply:

  • Catch one negative thought and turn it into a positive one;
  • Think of one thing for which you are grateful at the beginning of each day;
  • Say one “Fantastic!” when a friend or team member asks how you are doing;
  • Assume the best in one upcoming situation;
  • Keep on moving one more time when you experience adversity;
  • Help one friend or colleague in a time of need – and take pride in it.

Optimism thumbs upMany people used to feel that one vote in an election couldn’t really make a difference. Well, recent political elections that have been decided by razor thin margins have proven them wrong. A single
act can make a difference … it can create a ripple effect felt many miles and people away. So, ask yourself: What’s one thing I can do today that will make a positive difference in my attitude? Then DO IT!
Repeat that process every day and your life will improve – and so will the lives of the people you lead. Attitudes are truly powerful … and they’re contagious!

Be nice to people on your way up. You might need them on the way down. — Jimmy Durante

 

Gray Lawrence

Learn to let go. That is the key to happiness.”

”The most memorable moments in life are the ones you never planned.”

”You should never have to think twice about who your real friends are.”

Be Inspired by Mahisha Dellinger

PMA Added:

When you demand a blessing, what you’re demanding is of you.
You’re demanding yourself to change your attitude. You’re demanding yourself to see it differently. You’re demanding yourself to open up to the truth of who you are, and then naturally the results will become different.
Matter must obey the intent of consciousness, and is obeying the intent of consciousness.
Your body, your affairs, your relationships, your money — all of it is obeying the intent of your consciousness, right now.
What we demand is that we expand our awareness. Here’s To The Expansion,

 

How You Can Choose Wealth Over Riches

Mahisha DellingerIf I could share 500 words to inspire, this is the important wisdom I’d want to pass along to others…

 

I’m proud of my financial position in life, but contrary to what a lot of people may think, I never aspired to be rich. I wanted to be wealthy. It wasn’t always that way, though. I think there was a lot of fear driving me. Fear of being poor again and fear of going back to that impoverished life from my childhood.

Being rich and being wealthy seem to be synonymous with success. However, there’s a big difference between the two. The main difference between being rich and being wealthy is knowledge. Wealthy people know how to make money, while rich people only have money. Rich people are motivated by money, but wealthy people are motivated by their dreams, purpose and passion. Most rich people make a lot of money with their paychecks but the moment they stop working, they also stop making money. Wealth, true wealth, is often generational money and money that works for you.

Most people do want to be rich. We want to enjoy the fruits of their labor and live a life that is more fortunate and ultimately extravagant than the average man. We dream of having the nice things. These are things that everyone wants, but very few actually achieve. Essentially, it comes down to the person and their mindset. It also comes down to their purpose, motivation and will power. It’s never the ones that are just motivated by money, it’s the ones who are motivated to change the world and build a legacy because that is what wealth really is.

Your ability to cultivate desire and take persistent action is what will make you successful, not your natural talents. It’s all about consistent daily action. Wealthy and rich people both may experience downfalls and failures in their ventures. However, wealthy people are knowledgeable when it comes to money matters and can start all over again and build wealth over time.

The key to acquiring wealth is to regularly monitor and increase your passive and portfolio income by increasing your means to earn and decreasing your expenses. The moment you decide to make passive and portfolio income a part of your financial habit and discipline yourself in building it, you are on your way to financial freedom.

This is the path in maintaining a strong wealth foundation. Never forget that what you do on a daily basis determines your habits, and your habits determine who you are, what you accomplish, and the legacy you leave. People will measure you by what you do and what you have managed to accomplish in your lifetime, which then of course leads to your legacy.

If you have inspired people and they can share and tell your story for generations to come, then you have created wealth in your life. You have left a legacy. You have done something different – you didn’t settle for simply being rich.

I don’t work for my money. It works for me. That’s the key to separating the wealthy from the rich. While I am still working diligently on my plan to independent wealth, I am confident I am on the right path. Which path will you choose?

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. Henry David Thoreau

Gray Lawrence

"Forget mistakes. Forget failure. Forget everything except what you’re going to do now and do it. Today is your lucky day. -Will Durant

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Gray Lawrence

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Skype: graynat71

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