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10 Habits You Must Quit to Be Happy

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"Anytime you blame others and complain about your situation, you are choosing to be a victim. By playing the victim role you are putting yourself in an ineffective and weak position. It is virtually impossible to allow incredible miracles to enter your life when you choose to remain in this negative mental state." Sonia Ricotti Author and Speaker

WRITTEN by ANGEL CHERNOFF

10 Habits You Must Quit to Be Happy

When you quit doing the wrong things, you make more room for the things that make you happy.  So starting today…

1.  Quit procrastinating on your goals.

Some people dream of success while others wake up and work hard at it.  Action and change are often resisted when they’re needed most.  Get a hold of yourself and have discipline.  Putting something off instantly makes it harder and scarier.  What we don’t start today won’t be finished by tomorrow.  And there’s nothing more stressful than the perpetual lingering of an unfinished task.

The secret to getting ahead is simply getting started.  Starting, all by itself, is usually sufficient to build enough momentum to keep the ball rolling.  So forget about the finish line and just concentrate on taking your first step.  Say to yourself, “I choose to start this task with a small, imperfect step.”  All those small steps will add up and you’ll actually get to see changes fairly quickly.  Read Getting Things Done.

2.  Quit blaming others and making excuses.

Stop blaming others for what you have or don’t have, or for what you feel or don’t feel.  When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility and perpetuate the problem.  Stop giving your power away and start taking responsibility for your life.  Blaming is just another sorry excuse, and making excuses is the first step towards failure; you and only you are responsible for your life choices and decisions.

3.  Quit trying to avoid change.

If nothing ever changed there would be no sunrise the next morning.  Most of us are comfortable where we are even though the whole universe is constantly changing around us.  Learning to accept this is vital to our happiness and general success.  Because only when we change, do we grow, and begin to see a world we never knew was possible.

And don’t forget, however good or bad a situation is now, it will change.  That’s the one thing you can count on.  So embrace it, and realize that change happens for a reason.  It won’t always be easy or obvious at first, but in the end it will be worth it.

4.  Quit trying to control the uncontrollable.

If you try to control everything, and then worry about the things you can’t control, you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of frustration and misery.

Some forces are out of your control, but you can control how you react to things.  Everyone’s life has positive and negative aspects – whether you’re happy or not depends greatly on which aspects you focus on.  The best thing you can do is to let go of what you can’t control, and invest your energy in the things you can – like your attitude.

5.  Quit talking down to yourself.

Nothing will bring you down quicker than berating yourself.  The mind is a superb instrument if used right, but when used incorrectly, it becomes very destructive.  Be aware of your mental self-talk.  We all talk silently to ourselves in our heads, but we aren’t always conscious of what we’re saying or how it’s affecting us.

As Henry Ford once stated, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.”  One of the major causes of why we fail is due to self-doubt and negative self-talk.  The way to overcome negative thoughts and destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are stronger and more powerful.  Listen to your self-talk and replace negative thoughts with positive ones, over time you will change the trajectory of your life.  Read The How of Happiness.

6.  Quit criticizing others.

The negativity you bleed out toward others will gradually cripple your own happiness.  When you truly feel comfortable with your own imperfections, you won’t feel threatened or offended by the imperfections you see in other people.

So stop worrying about the flaws you see in everyone else, and focus on yourself.  Let the constant growth and improvement in your own life keep you so busy that you have no time left to criticize others.

7.  Quit running from your problems and fears.

Trust me, if everyone threw their problems in a pile for you to see, you would grab yours back.  Tackle your problems and fears swiftly, don’t run away from them.  The best solution is to face them head on no matter how powerful they may seem.

Fears, in particularly, stop you from taking chances and making decisions.  They keep you confined to just the small space where you feel completely comfortable.  But your life’s story is simply the culmination of many small, unique experiences, many of which require you to stretch your comfort zone.  Letting your fears and worries control you is not ‘living,’ it’s merely existing.

Bottom line:  Either you own your problems and fears, or they will ultimately own you.

8.  Quit living in another time and place.

Some people spend their entire lives trying to live in another time and place.  They lament about what has been, what they could have done, or what might become.  However, the past is gone, and the future doesn’t exist.  No matter how much time we spend thinking and lamenting about either, it doesn’t change anything.

One of life’s sharpest paradoxes is that our brightest future hinges on our ability to pay attention to what we’re doing right now, today.

We need to live more in the moment.  Living in the moment requires active, open, intentional awareness on the present.  Don’t fantasize about being on vacation while at work, and don’t worry about the work piling up on your desk when you’re on vacation.  Live for now.  Notice the beauty unfolding around you.

9.  Quit trying to be someone you’re not.

One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else.  Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you.  Don’t change so people will like you.  Be yourself and the right people will love you, and you’ll love yourself more too.  The Road Less Traveled.

10.  Quit being ungrateful.

Not all the puzzle pieces of life will seem to fit together at first, but in time you’ll realize they do, perfectly.  So thank the things that didn’t work out, because they just made room for the things that will.  And thank the ones who walked away from you, because they just made room for the ones who won’t.

No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life.  Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs.  Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.

"Life is the sum of all your choices" Albert Camus                                                       Gray Lawrence                                                                                                     Independent Distributor Utility Warehouse                                                            We are still masters of our fate. We are still captains of our souls. Winston Churchill

Develope yourself

Change your mental attitude, and the world around you will change accordingly.
Your world will become what you choose to make it. You can reach great heights of success, or you can settle for a miserable life that is devoid of hope. The choice is yours. When you choose a positive course, you set in motion an unstoppable force that will allow you to have a fulfilling career, the love of your family and friends, good physical and mental health, and all of the other true riches of life. To change your world, you must change it from the inside out. You must begin with yourself. When you choose the course that puts your life on a positive track, you will change your life for the better, and you will also positively influence the people with whom you come in contact.            Napoleon Hill

Develop your core self.
‘ ‘Human beings are the only creatures who do not mature automatically. A baby chick has no choice but to turn into a chicken. But the world is full of people stuck in childhood and adolescence, no matter how old they happen to be. For us, to mature is a decision: Adulthood is an achievement, one that requires—and results in—personal power.
This can takes decades, but it starts with a vision of the "core self." This is the part of you that connects to reality, placing you at the centre of experiences that you personally create. To have a core self is to be the author of your own story; it is the exact opposite of being a victim, who must live a life authored by others.

Powerful thinking creates a powerful energy in your life, but it all starts with a powerful heart “Heart Set” which creates a “Powerful Mind Set”

Align yourself with the flow of evolution, or personal growth.
Once you establish your core self as a goal, your path will unfold and you will evolve. This evolution is wobbly at first; everyone has at least some elements of ignorance and immaturity. But’ ‘thanks to free will, you can help guide your own evolution. The simple fact is that we all desire more and better things for ourselves. If those more and better things are good for our growth, then we are guiding our own positive and powerful evolution. In India they make a distinction between dharma and adharma. Dharma includes whatever naturally upholds life: happiness, truth, duty, virtue, wonder, worship, reverence, appreciation, nonviolence, love, self-respect. On the other hand, adharma consists of choices that do not support life naturally: anger, violence, fear, control, dogmatism, scepticism, unvirtuous acts, prejudice, addiction, intolerance, and unconsciousness in general.
For our purposes, dharma is the ultimate power. It easily supports you, a single individual. What is asked of you is that you honestly look at your everyday life and the choices you are making. Ask yourself how to increase the dharmic
choices and decrease the adharmic ones.

You learn in life that the only person you can really correct and change is yourself.   You never achieve real success unless you like what you are doing.    Your own mind is a sacred enclosure into which nothing harmful can enter except by your permission.  Stan Billue

 

Trust in a power that transcends everyday reality.
Nothing described so far will come true without a higher reality. For the moment, let’s leave aside religion and any reference to God. Fortunately, to have even a speck of consciousness is to be connected to the finite consciousness that supports life, evolution, creativity, and intelligence. None of these things are accidental or a privilege handed out to the lucky few.
To use a metaphor, imagine that you are caught in a net. All nets have holes, so find one, and jump through it. I’ve known wives of abusive husbands who found a hole through, say, learning to paint. For them, it was an escape route, and as they made art, their thinking changed from "I am trapped and can do nothing" to "I must be worth more than I imagined, because look at this beautiful thing I created." Escape routes exist along the qualities hidden in consciousness. They include:
Creativity. Go beyond by discovery and exploration. This leads to insight. Your inner vision clears. You start to see glimmers of light through the fog of your situation. Something more beautiful starts to attract you, and you want to go toward it.
Intelligence. Let your mind lead the way. You start having newer, more exciting thoughts than the old habitual ones you’ve been following. Beliefs are challenged. New points of view attract you, so you move toward them. You’ll want to expand your mind in place of living behind defences and boundaries.
Love and compassion. Discover that you can forgive yourself and others. Fantasies of hurt and revenge are replaced with emotional softening. You see that there is untapped love around you, so you move toward it. The fact that you desire to love and be loved starts to motivate you, without excuses about being unworthy.
Quantum leaps. Notice—and learn—when you have an epiphany, a moment of dramatic awakening. These are the great "aha" experiences that peel away an entire layer of reality. We say that the heavens open, but really it’s a new level of consciousness, one that brings more light.
Devotion. Understand that life is full of awe and wonder. From this you see a reason to revere your own existence. You have been placed in a world where you can be devoted to something, and your worship gives you a sense of worth.
These escape routes all lead back to the person you really are, and that person know that what really counts extends far beyond the individual: the glory of creation, the beauty of nature, the heart qualities of love and compassion, the mental power to discover new things, and those unexpected epiphanies that bring the presence of God—these universal aspects are your true source of power. They are you, and you are all of them.

Our highest power is love, and it is one thing each of us has an unlimited amount of. How much love do you give to others in one day? Each day we have an opportunity to set out with this great, unlimited power in our possession, and pour it over every person and circumstance. Love is appreciating, complimenting, feeling gratitude, and speaking good words to others We have so much love to give, and the more that we give, the more we receive. May the joy be with you, The Secret Rhonda Byrne

 

The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way. Robert Kiyosaki

Gray Lawrence  Utility Warehouse Distributor 

“Seek opportunities and experiences that invigorate you, those that are challenging, and that demand you show up as your very best self.” – David Howitt

Be Inspired by Colette Baron-Reid

PMA Added.

From The Secret Daily Teachings

Never let a day pass without looking for the good, feeling the good within you, praising, appreciating, blessing, and being grateful. Make it your life commitment, and you will stand in utter awe of what happens in your life. May the joy be with you,
Rhonda Byrne

 

Inspired Quote of the Day™

Anyone can change the world with the willingness to surrender to a Higher Power, to shift their perception, to become accountable and to take a leap of faith regardless of outer conditions. ~ Colette Baron-Reid


Today’s Brilliance™

Colette Baron-Reid

Colette is an internationally respected intuitive counsellor and life strategist, coach, speaker, broadcast personality and bestselling author.

If I could share 500 words of wisdom to summarize what I’ve learned so far in life, these are the important things I’d want to pass along to others…

When people ask what I’ve learned from the experiences in my life I have to smile. What always comes to my mind is faith, accountability, courage, forgiveness and compassion.

I have learned perception is everything, And, most of all participating in your own rescue is not an option. It’s a necessity.

My life has been an amazing adventure from the very beginning. Some may hear my story and say, "How did she survive"? I have gone from the highs and lows of a childhood where I had no idea that my sense of always being different, feeling and seeing so many things beyond my understanding would ever make sense, to an eating disorder, to alcohol abuse, to rape, violence and drug addiction. While any one of these experiences can be defined as horrible, collectively, it’s my life. They all led me to the person I am today, and enabled me the gift of insight and deep compassion for others who suffer.

All of those painful devastating things led to an extraordinary spiritual awakening and the deep integrated recovery that is a reflection of who I am today. I could tell my story as a victim or I could tell it as an adventure where I was the heroine that found the magic of meaning in all stories. Both would be true.

And there are other stories within the stories! There have been more that shape the person I am; writing and singing music, creating bestselling books, meeting the man of my dreams, and countless others. So what do they all mean? Whatever I decide they mean.

I tell them all the same thing. Perception is paramount. I’ve learned to define what the experience could mean to me, only when I allow myself to see through Spirit’s eyes and then the choices really begin.

I’ve learned that in order to thrive in life you MUST participate in your own rescue. This means being willing to take ownership of your role and actions in the experience. Make the choice to:

  • Love yourself enough to ask for help.
  • Love yourself enough to say no when it is necessary.
  • Love yourself enough to receive the help with an open heart. Your self worth depends on it! Participating in your own rescue also means that you are willing to be brave enough to do whatever it takes to turn yourself around.

Throughout my life I’ve had what some would deem as insurmountable events show up. I had many opportunities to give up. Surrender. Allow life to happen "to me". But, I discovered along my journey that these events shape me and give me the tools I need to help others with their journey. My ideal is to use my experiences as an example to others of what can happen when you make a choice to define the experience as opposed to allowing the experience to happen to you.

This line of thinking and feeling has brought me to deep levels of self worth. When I can guide someone out of the dark to a beautiful new landscape, my heart is filled with love for all that I have learned. Paying forward is my ultimate reward!

When you CHOOSE your perception, participate in your own rescue, and love yourself enough to allow the experience to educate you, you will grow by leaps and bounds!

There is no paycheck that can equal the feeling of contentment that comes from being the person you are meant to be.         Oprah Winfrey

 

Your Vision of the future lies from within

Gray Lawrence

 Utility Warehouse Distributor

“The Power of Listening is available to us all, only those who listen will gain great benefits in life, love personal & financial wealth. The decision is yours”   Gray Lawrence

Be Inspired by Marci Shimoff

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Happiness is not a destination. It is a method of life." Burton Hills

 

Where To Find Happiness

If I could share 500 words to inspire, this is the important wisdom I’d want to pass along to others…

Marci ShimoffI was 41 years old, stretched out on a lounge chair by my pool and reflecting on my life. I had achieved all that I thought I needed to be happy. I had a successful career that helped people, a loving husband, a comfortable home, a great body, and a wonderful circle of friends.

But surprisingly I wasn’t on top of the world. I felt an emptiness inside that the outer successes of life couldn’t fill. I was also afraid that if I lost any of those things, I might be miserable. Sadly, I knew I wasn’t alone in feeling this way.

While happiness is the one thing that we all truly want, so few people really experience the deep and lasting fulfilment that feeds our soul. Our Founding Fathers even guaranteed us the right to pursue happiness, so why aren’t we finding it?

Because we’re looking for happiness, in the words of the old country western song, in “all the wrong places.”

The culmination of my pursuit of happiness was when I discovered a state I call Happy for No Reason, a neurophysiologic state of inner peace and well-being that isn’t dependent on circumstances. I believe this is our essential state.

When you’re Happy for No Reason, you bring happiness to your everyday experiences rather than extract happiness from them. You don’t need to manipulate the world around you to try to make yourself happy. You live from happiness, rather than for it.

Most of us struggle to string together as many happy experiences as we can, like beads in a necklace, to create a happy life. We do our best to find just the right beads that will fulfil us. Being Happy for No Reason, in this analogy, is like having a happy string. No matter what beads we put on our necklace—good and not so good—our inner reality, the string that runs through them all, is happy, and we experience an unshakeable positive state inside.

So, how do we get there?

The only difference between happy and unhappy people is that they have different habits.One of the most prevalent habits that happy people share is believing that the universe is out to support them—that this is a friendly universe. When things don’t seem to be going their way, instead of feeling like victims, they look for the lesson and the gift in the situation. In other words, they believe there is a higher purpose that is supporting their ultimate good.

Practicing this one habit has made a huge difference in my own life. Try it yourself: The next time you face a challenge, take a moment to reflect silently, asking yourself, “If this were happening for a higher purpose, what would it be?” I’m certain that whatever answer you discover will be illuminating, but more importantly you’ll begin tapping into that state of inner peace and well-being on a regular basis.

Remember, when you’re Happy for No Reason, it’s not that your life always looks perfect—it’s that however it looks, you’ll still be happy!

Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Gray Lawrence

Independent Distributor Utility Warehouse

Opportunities are never lost. . . . They are found by someone else!” – Mike Mc Donald

Motivation Recharge

"Set a goal to achieve something that is so big, so exhilarating that it excites you and scares you at the same time. It must be a goal that is so appealing, so much in line with your spiritual core, that you can’t get it out of your mind. If you do not get chills when you set a goal, your not setting big enough goals." Bob Proctor

How to Recharge Your Motivation

Sometimes, when you have so many items on your to-do list, getting anything important accomplished becomes daunting. All the menial tasks start to take up the majority of your time and, before you know it, the important things fall by the wayside. Finding the motivation to continue pursuing the things that really matter to you is not something you can just do once. Staying motivated requires taking the time to occasionally re-focus your thoughts and priorities, outline your goals, and do things that help you feel inspired and creative! The practice of recharging your motivation will help you follow through on your goals and make real progress in your life.

Re-examine your focus

Take a minute to reflect on how you currently spend your time. Sometimes, without realizing it, we can get stuck spending too much time on things that aren’t the most important to us. What are your main priorities and goals in life? I have four main commitments in my life that stem from different categories. Each day I try to spend time with my family, working, exercising, and being spiritual. Too frequently, I notice that one area has started to slip and I again need to revisit how I spend my time and allocate more or less time to certain areas.

Get inspired

When you have a big goal that might take some time to accomplish, it’s important to continue to inspire yourself. Spend time in environments that help you feel creative and motivated! Whether you feel inspired walking around the city, getting lost in the library, spending a day at the beach or in the mountains, or even just

talking with people who have accomplished what you’re striving for, make sure you spend time inspiring and motivating yourself to continue pursuing your goals.

Create an end goal

If you’ve noticed that you’ve been less motivated to achieve one of your goals or stick to a priority in your life, figure out what motivates you in that area. For some people, they need to have an “end” in their mind, something to work towards. For example, if you’re a runner, but you can’t find the motivation to hit the trail, you might consider signing up for a race in 3-6 months. With the end goal of the race, you’ll be more motivated to get up and run each day. Whatever your goal is, find something that motivates you to continue working toward it.

Examine your progress

When you’re working toward a goal, a great motivator can be to examine how far you’ve already come. If your goal is to be fluent in Spanish, reflect on how much you’ve learned so far. Maybe now you can have a small conversation in Spanish and understand even more. Take notes of your progress and track how much you’ve improved. The ability to track your progress will help you see that all your hard work is paying off and inspire you to continue.

“Of course motivation is not permanent. But then, neither is bathing; but it is something you should do on a regular basis.” – Zig Ziglar

"You do not always have to know when you are going to get to your goal, or how you are going to get to your goal, but you do need to take the next step." Peggy McColl

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. Henry David Thoreau

Gray Lawrence

 Independent Distributor Utility Warehouse

"Forget mistakes. Forget failure. Forget everything except what you’re going to do now and do it. Today is your lucky day. -Will Durant

 

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